The Eggman of Oz
by tehcatlikepie
Summary: Cream and Cheese are living not so peacefully in Station Square when a freak tornado comes and carries them off to a strange land. With a horrible witch after Cream's new boots and idiotic sidekicks with their own problems, will they be able to get home?
1. The Beginering

**!Hola! This is my first story here and I hope you enjoy it. It's a parody of the Wizard of Oz with Characters from Sonic the Hedgehog in it. I've really got no clue what I'm doing and I'm kind of making it up as I go. Characters will probably be OOC, especially Cheese. Hopefully, you find it funny. If you don't, well … you suck (I kid :P) **

**Sorry for the long note, I'm just a little nervous.**

**Disclaimer: I obviously do not own Sonic the Hedgehog. They are property of Sega. I also do not own the Wizard of Oz. It is property of … some … one … thing …**

Enjoy :3

Chapter **1!!!!!!1!!!!!!!11!!!!1! **_The Beginering_

Captain's log 66 and another 6. We just escaped the Alien planet after Scotty fired a laser out of his … wait … this is a Wizard of Oz spoof … crap … uhh, yeah. Now the real beginning…

Cream the Rabbit was sitting on the porch of her mother's house/shack thing on her farm in the middle of Kans- … I mean … Station Square.

"Ahh, what a lovely day!" announced Cream to her chao, Cheese, "Even though everything's in black and white, it's still pretty." This is because Station Square had run out of money after paying for the damages caused by all the attacks on the area. To cut costs, they reverted back to the old days of farms and black and white coloring.

"Chao chao (Shut up)!" replied Cheese.

'Hey look! It's mister Sonic out in the corn field again!" said Cream.

Sure enough, Sonic The Hedgehog was out in the corn field again, trying to scare away crows. The problem was, the crows were scaring Sonic. "AAAHHH!!! Get off me you freakin' birds! Cream, HELP MEEEE!!!" screeched Sonic.

"Hi mister Sonic!" said Cream as Sonic came running by, waving his arms around and screaming from the pain of the crow's persistent pecking.

"Don't just sit there, help me! Ow! That's my eye you're pecking! Ahhh, the pain!"

"I like playing with the birds too, mister Sonic, but you should get back to work scaring the rest of the crows out of the fields or we won't have anything to harvest." said Cream.

"Augh! You're useless! I'm running to Knuckles. He's got a shotgun!" And with that, Sonic ran to the backyard to get Knuckles The Echidna. Cream watched him go and when he disappeared behind the barn, she turned to Cheese.

"Mister Sonic is funny, isn't he Cheese?" said Cream.

"Chao chao (Burn in hell)" replied Cheese.

All of a sudden, screaming and gun shots were heard from behind the barn.

"Ahhh! Knuckles, you shot me in the freakin' eye!"

"I'm trying to get the fing crows, Sonic! You got in the way!"

"I'm going to tell Vanilla!"

"Go ahead! She'll probably say you deserved it!"

At that moment, Vanilla, Cream's mom, walked out onto the porch where Cream and Cheese were. "What's going on back there, Cream?" asked Vanilla.

"Oh, mister Sonic just needed mister Knuckles help to scare away the crows," said Cream.

"Oh … well, okay then. Just wanted to know!" said Vanilla, "Cream, did you help Tails with the animals yet?"

"Yes I did, mommy!" said Cream.

"Okay, well then come inside. I made pie." said Vanilla. Then Cream, Cheese, and Vanilla went inside to get some pie.

XXX

Sonic and Knuckles were relieved to see the crows finally leave. The crows decided to go eat the corn instead of Sonic. When they left, Sonic and Knuckles went into the barn to get the first aid kit. I don't know why they keep it in the barn, they just do.

"Knuckles, have you found it yet? I think I'm losing consciousness …" said Sonic.

"Hold on, Sonic. I think it's here somewhere … what the hell?" said Knuckles.

Knuckles had just found Miles 'Tails' Prower, who was being crushed under the weight of the overturned cow on top of him. Only his head was sticking out from underneath the cow's body.

"Tails? What are you doing here, and how did you get under that cow?" Asked Knuckles.

"Well, Cream was helping me with the animals when she decided to get a drink of water. After she left, her sadistic little chao tipped the cow right on top of me! I think it's trying to kill me. This is the third time this week." explained Tails.

"WRONG! He was trying to kill Cream! He just didn't tip the cow in time to flatten her little ass …" Sonic began. Then he passed out on the floor from blood loss.

"Uhh … I think Vanilla's calling me." said Knuckles. A red blur dashed out of the barn at that moment.

"Great. How am I suppose to get out of this one?" said Tails. The crows then flew into the barn and began to peck at Sonic's body.

XXX

It was now 9:00 p.m., and Cream was preparing to go to bed. All of a sudden, a crocodile came hurtling in through the window. Cream gave a terrified shriek as she stared at the crocodile laying spread eagle on the floor. He then popped up and stood there, staring at Cream, and then at Cheese, who was silently tip-toeing towards Cream with a knife that he then hid behind his back. Then he looked back at Cream and pulled out a card from his pocket.

"Greetings, sir and or madam," the crocodile began, reading off the card, "I am The Great insert name here! … oh, wait, The Great Vector, Traveling Salesman!" " Would you like to buy this shiny nickel?" he asked. Vector held out his hand, revealing a rusted half of what used to be a nickel.

"You broke into my room, completely shattering the window, scaring a little girl and her pet chao half to death, just to sell me a crappy nickel?" asked Cream.

"Yes!" shouted Vector.

"OKAY! How much?"

"Five rings."

"I'll give you eleven for two!"

"Deal!" Exclaimed Vector. Cream threw twenty rings at Vector and swiped the former nickel from his hand. She eyed the nickel admiringly. After Vector finished picking up all the rings she threw at him (and inspecting her drawers for any more), he remembered what he had to tell her, "Oh, and a tornado is suppose to come tomorrow night and sweep you off to a magical world."

"Silence, sewer lizard! Leave me with my nickel!" hissed Cream. She hunched over the nickel and continued to twirl it in between her index finger and thumb. Vector shrugged and jumped back out the window, leaving Cream with her nickel and Cheese with his knife. "Look what I got, Cheese. A shiny nickel!' proclaimed Cream.

"Chao! Chao chao (St! I'll have to kill you another day)!" whispered Cheese to himself. It wouldn't matter had he shouted it though, she wouldn't have understood what he said anyway.

"Good night, Cheese!" said Cream.

Cream then tied Cheese to the nightstand and hopped into bed and fell fast asleep.

…

**YAY! All done. Chapter 2 will come sooner or later … thank you for reading. I appreciate it J**

… **Stupid Computer ….**


	2. The Wicked Witch and Tornadoes Cometh

**I have another chapter for you all dressed up and ready to go! Enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: See previous Chapter. I think you all get the idea :P**

Chapter **2!!!!!11!!11!!!!!1!!!** _The Wicked Witch and Tornadoes Cometh_

It was early in the morning, right before sunrise, when, with the help of his trusty knife, Cheese had cut himself loose of the string that kept him tethered to the night stand.

"Chao chao chao? Chao (You think you can keep me here with nothing but a wimpy string? I'll show you)!" began Cheese, as he raised the knife above his head , ready to finally be rid of Cream, when a though came to mind. "Chao … chao. Chao chao (Nah … too dirty. I need you to see your end)," said Cheese. "Chao, chao chao ( Well, off to the ammunitions store)." And with that, Cheese jumped out the window previously broken by Vector the previous night. Previously.

"Cheese?" said Cream sleepily. "Cheese … oh no! Cheese is missing again!' she said. Cream jumped out of bed and burst through the door, running off to the kitchen. She slid on the linoleum and fell face first into Tail's bowl of oatmeal.

"Cream, what's wrong?" asked Vanilla, " Was it that thing that came in through the window last night?"

"No, Cheese is missing again!" yelled Cream, still having her face crammed firmly in Tails's breakfast. Magically though, her mom understood her, and now had a panicked look on her face.

"Oh no! Quick, you check the barn, Cream. I'll go check the cellar." said Vanilla.

"Okay mom!" replied Cream. Then they both went their separate ways, and Cream took Tail's oatmeal with her.

"HEY! That's my breakfast!" hollered Tails. He wanted to chase after Cream, but his full body cast prevented him from doing so. Tails sighed and turned his head (which was still free) to face Knuckles. "Can I have some of your oatmeal, Knuckles?' asked Tails.

"Hell no! I worked hard to get this oatmeal, and all you do is get cows tipped on top of you!" yelled Knuckles.

Tails sighed again and began to look around the table. He them noticed Sonic had not been there the whole time. "Hey, where is Sonic?" thought Tails out loud.

"I propped him up in the corn field after we bandaged his eye yesterday." said Knuckles.

Tails then looked out the window and sure enough, Sonic was propped up in the corn field, dressed as a scarecrow, and having his other eye pecked out by crows. Tails could hear Sonic yelling incoherent words at the crows and occasionally screaming in pain. "Oh …" said Tails, "Then can I have his oatmeal?"

"NO! What did I tell you before? You don't work so you don't get any!" yelled Knuckles. The red echidna then snatched up Sonic's breakfast and flung it out the window towards Sonic. The flying bowl smacked the blue hedgehog in the head, knocking him out cold. "There, now Sonic can enjoy his breakfast without having to worry about YOU stealing it." proclaimed Knuckles proudly. He then continued eating his oatmeal, while Tails stared at his bowl hungrily.

XXX

Cheese had finally reached the ammunitions store, Nack n' Go, and walked inside. The walls were covered with an assortment of rifles, shotguns, pistols, rocket launchers, bazookas, grenades, and way more things that I either can't think up or are too lazy to type. Oddly though, there were cute, fluffy kittens prancing around in the display case by the window. This always puzzled Cheese. He then flew up to the counter and rang the service bell.

"Chaoooo (Helloooo)!" Hollered Cheese. A rustling was heard and then a weasel popped up from behind the counter.

"Allo! How may I be of service today?" said the weasel.

"Chao chao, chao chao (I'm looking for a gun, a cool gun that can kill instantly)." said Cheese. The weasel then disappeared behind the counter and came back up with a gun with the front resembling Omochao.

"This is the Omochao gun! It shoots the severed heads of omochao!" said the weasel. He then fired the gun and the severed head of an omochao shot out and began ricocheting off the walls frantically.

"Press the a button to jump and the b button to fire yo-" before it could finish it's monologue, the bouncing head disappeared.

"Chao … chao chao … chao chao … chao (Uhh … can I get something that is more silent … and doesn't bounce off the walls … and kills in one shot maybe?)" asked Cheese. This time the weasel went through the door behind him. Cheese had to wait for a couple of minutes before the weasel came back out with a black rifle with markings on it.

"This is called the Shadow Rifle. It can kill nearly anything in one shot!" The weasel then aimed at the display case with the kittens in it. Cheese thought he finally understood why the kittens were there. But when the weasel fired, the bullet went through the glass and missed every single kitten. The bullet kept traveling until it finally lodged itself inside a black arms alien across the street, making the alien promptly explode into a giant puddle of ooze.

"Chaoooo (Ooooo)!" said Cheese. "Chao (I'll take it)!"

"Sorry, you can't have it. It's on hold for someone else." The weasel told Cheese.

"Chao chao (I'll give you this shiny nickel)." Cheese then held out the rusted half-nickel Vector sold to Cream last night.

"Deal!" The weasel then swiped the nickel from Cheese and quickly crammed it into the cash register and shoved the gun into Cheese's arms. "No refunds!" The weasel shouted, and then he disappeared behind the counter again.

"Chao (Sweet)." said Cheese. Then he walked out of the store with his lovely Shadow rifle in his arms and began to plot ways to use it on Cream.

A little while later, a bat on a bike came around the other side of the store, hopped off the bike and walked into Nack n' Go. She rang the service bell on the counter and the weasel popped up again.

"Allo! How may I be of service today?" he asked.

"Hello, I'm here to pick up the Shadow rifle you have on hold for me. I should be under the name Rouge the Bat." the lady said.

"Oh … sorry ma'am, but I kinda … sold it." the weasel said nervously.

"SOLD IT! But I had it on hold! Why the hell did you sell it?!" screamed Rouge.

"I was given a shiny nickel for it." said the weasel, now cowering behind the counter.

"WHAT!? That Shadow Rifle is worth WAY more than any stupid nickel! And I need it to get rid of that varmint those Rabbits have!" she shrieked, "Who did you sell it to?"

"Itwasthischaothatcameinearlierandhecouldn'thavegonethatfarpleasedon'thurtme!" rambled the weasel. Rouge then picked up the weasel by the collar of his shirt.

"Which way did it go?" she hissed menacingly.

"t- tt- to th- the l- ll- left." the weasel sputtered out.

Rouge then dropped the weasel and stalked out of the store. She then hopped on her bike and began to go the direction that Cheese went. "I'll get you my pretty." she said and she began to pick up the pace upon sighting a small animal with a rifle in it's arms.

XXX

Cream was still looking for Cheese in the barn when she heard the ear splitting shrieks that either were someone in pain, or a chao not getting it's way. That meant …

'Cheese?' thought Cream. She then ran to the front door of her house to see a white bat, who she recognized as Rouge, standing there holding Cheese by the scruff of the neck. The latter was thrashing about, screaming it's head off, trying to reach for the rifle the bat had in her other hand. "Hey, what are you doing to Cheese?" said Cream, now angry at the white bat for possibly hurting Cheese.

"Nothing. Your damned little chao here just tried to steal my property!" said the bat.

"You let Cheese go right now!" demanded Cream.

"What's going on out here?" Vanilla asked as she walked up from the cellar.

"This chao was stealing my property again." began Rouge. This wouldn't be the first time Cheese has stolen something from Rouge. Cheese knew that Rouge's friend, Shadow, had a very large weapons supply that he kept at Rouge's house. Cheese had tried to take many of these weapons before, but always got caught because after he got one of those weapons, he would begin shouting and shoot the nearest appliance in the room.

"Gasp Cheese, is this true?" asked Vanilla.

"Chao chao, chao chao chao (it doesn't matter what I say, you can't understand me anyway)!" yelled Cheese.

"Shame on you, Cheese!" scolded Vanilla. "I am so sorry miss Rouge."

"Well, if I catch him doing it again, I will have him thrown in the pound!" said Rouge. She really just wanted to shoot the little pest to bits, but knew that would cause an uproar from the whiny brat.

"No, you can't!" said Cream.

As Rouge opened her mouth to respond, a scream was heard from the corn field. The three of them turned to see Knuckles, Sonic and Tails out there.

"What the hell is that?" asked Rouge.

"Oh, that's just our farm hands … tending to the crops …" replied Vanilla nervously.

By "tending to the crops", Vanilla meant that Knuckles was shooting at the crows flying around Sonic's unconscious body, and Tails was trapped under another overturned cow.

"Knuckles, help me-"

"Not now, Tails! I'm trying to kill the cro- stop moving you little ss"

Knuckles began firing his shotgun again and Tails continued to whine about not receiving any help from the red echidna.

"Um … I'm going to go now." said Rouge slowly. She then dropped Cheese and hopped onto her bike and peddled off.

"Chao. Chao, chao (That's right. You better peddle, you bch)!" said Cheese.

"Cream, you have to be more watchful of Cheese, okay?" said Vanilla.

"But mom I-"

"NO BUTS!" yelled Vanilla. All of a sudden, a tornado touched down in the distance. "Ahhh! A random tornado just touched down. TO THE CELLAR!!" Then Vanilla ran back into the cellar and slammed the door shut, leaving Cream with Cheese.

"Oh look! A random tornado destroying everything in it's path!" yelled Knuckles. He then ran off towards the tornado and got sucked up into it.

"Come, Cheese. To my room!" proclaimed Cream.

"Chao, chao (No, you idiot)!" replied Cheese, but it was too late to convince Cream otherwise. She grabbed Cheese by the throat and ran into the house and into her room. She then jumped into her bed and hid under the covers with Cheese.

They felt the house shake violently as it was ripped up from the ground and sucked into the tornado. Cream and Cheese clung to the mattress for dear life. After a little bit, Cream decided to peek out from under the covers in time to see Knuckles fly by the window, waving his arms around and a look of pure enjoyment on his face. It looked like he was having a seizure. Then she saw Sonic fly by, not know what was going on because he was still unconscious. Cheese decided to join Cream in her sight seeing and peeked out as well. Then Tails flew by with Knuckles's shotgun and took aim at Cheese. "This is for tipping cows on me all the time!" he shouted. But before he could fire, a cow flew by and slammed into Tails, making him lose grip on the shotgun. "NOOOOOO!!!!" he screamed as he was flying away.

Finally, Cream saw Rouge going by on her bicycle, when all of a sudden, Rouge's bike began to fade away, being replaced by a broom, as her clothing faded to black and a pointed hat appeared on her head. Cream gasped in horror as the former Rouge began to cackle loudly as her cape whipped around in the air. Rouge then disappeared and Cream heard a loud thud as she was tossed up into the air. When she landed, everything went black.

…

**Oooo …. I wonder where they are. See you next time! And thanks to the lone reviewer. I really appreciate it!**

**I've typed up about 3 more chapters already, so they should be coming soon as well.**


	3. We're not in Station Square Anymore

**Here's the third Chapter! ... I should really start typing the other chapters or else this might not me updated for a whole month :P I've got two more Chapters typed already, so they'll be posted soon :)**

**In the meantime, Enjoy!**

Chapter **3!!!!!11!!!!!1!!1!1!11! **_We're Not in Station Square Anymore _

Cream was feeling very dizzy after she woke up on her bed. She then noticed that Cheese was missing, and began to look for him frantically. 'Now why did Tails try to shoot Cheese? he's done nothing wrong.' Cream thought to herself. This shows how naive Cream really is. What a dork.

While Cream was stumbling around, she tripped over a small lump on the floor covered with the blanket. Cream became very scared. 'What if there's a monster underneath' Cream thought. She then grabbed a two by four laying next to her and slowly approached the lump under the blanket. She then pulled the blanket off the lump and began beating the life out of it while she screamed out a battle cry.

"Chao, chao (What the hell, woman)!" Screamed Cheese as he was being pummeled by the wooden floorboard.

"Huh?" said Cream, as she opened her eyes to see Cheese curled up on the floor with cuts and bruises all over his body. "Oh Cheese!" She then pounced on the chao and trapped him in a giant bear ... bunny hug. "I thought I lost you! ...Oh my god! Tails must have shot you!" Shouted Cream. Cheese just stared at Cream. Just stared with a dumbfounded look on his face.

'How could anyone be so fing stupid!' he screamed in his head. On the inside, he was shooting Cream with the now taken Shadow Rifle, over, and over again, blood and rabbit bits flying everywhere as Cheese laughed maniacally. In reality, he just laid there in Cream's arms, blankly starting at her while a drop of drool oozed from the corner of his mouth.

Cream got up and opened the door to go outside. She gasped and just stood there, gaping at the wonderful display that now lay before her. Colors and plants that twisted and curled into fantastic shapes winding around little gingerbread houses nestled in between aqua blue bushes. Everything lay on the edge of a brick road which was a bright, sunny yellow. Cream looked into the distance and saw the road trailing off into the emerald landscape. "Yay! We can now afford to color the place again!" Said Cream happily. She then paused. "Cheese, I don't think we're in Station Square anymore."

"Chao, chao(No s, Cream)" said Cheese dryly. At least he thought he sounded that way. All Cream heard was the happy chirp of a chao agreeing with her. She finally stepped out into the foreign world and walked to the center of what appeared to be a village of some sort. As soon as she was into the center, she heard the rustling of leaves and giggling. Well, it sounded more like the grunts and gurgles of demonic creatures, but it was giggling nonetheless. All of a sudden, giant grayish creatures and small pinkish blobs emerged from the bushes and slowly approached Cream and Cheese. They looked like those aliens that invaded the earth not too long ago.

"flibusheoamegraaherao!" Screamed one of the aliens. It was just saying hello to Cream, but she thought it was attacking, so she whipped out her two-by-four and leaped at the screaming alien and began beating it while giving her own battle screech. The alien soon exploded into a puddle of green slime and Cream stopped the vicious beating.

"Anyone else want some?!" said Cream. The aliens were trembling at the sight of the rabbit covered in their brethren's blood. Then rustling and some muffled yells were heard from the bushes. A giant hand shot out of one and began clawing at the brick road. It was then grabbed by two aliens standing by and they began trying to pull it out. With one last tug, a giant black blob shot from the bushes and landed face down at Cream's feet. It then began floating and faced upright in front of Cream.

It had no legs to speak of whatsoever, and was garbed in what looked like rags taken from random hobos off the street. Gaudy jewelry sway to and fro from it's neck, or lack of, and three glowing red eyes were staring down at Cream. You can tell I don't do so well with describing things, can't you?

"Why do you attack The Black Arms, foreign life form?" It's voice sounded like some 900 year old chain smoker. And Cheese couldn't even understand how it could talk, for it had no mouth. Cream just stood there, petrified with fear. Her caramel eyes were as large as dinner plates as she stared at the alien.

"I- I-" She tried to speak, but couldn't find the right words.

"You … what?" asked the alien. Cream guessed that he must be the leader. Then one of the aliens said something intelligible to the floating one. Then the floating alien floated over to the puddle of green ooze that stained the brilliant brick road. It then turned back to Cream. "Why did you attack The Black Arms?!" he said angrily.

"I th- thought it was attacking m- me." replied Cream shakily.

"Hmm … are you from that place we attacked not too long ago? What was it called, uhh … ee arth?"

"It's called earth and y-"

"Don't correct The Black Arms!" shouted the floating alien, "Especially their leader, Black Doom! That's me, by the way." He said, as he pointed to himself. "Well, I can understand why you attacked then. Fear not, though. We gave up on those ways and moved to this disgusting place after that traitorous son of mine defeated us and blew up the Black Comet." He said the last past very bitterly. "His name was … sh--head?"

"You mean mister Shadow?" said Cream.

"What did I tell you before? Don't correct The Black Arms!" shouted Black Doom. He then continued, "Then he goes and runs off with that whore … uhh … boobs, or something like that. That's all I really remember about her." mumbled Black Doom, more to himself than to Cream. Cream decided not to correct him on who the person's name was. Then there was shouting coming from where Cream's house landed. Cream, Cheese and Black Doom went over there to see what was going on.

"Oh my!" gasped Cream, as she noticed that feet were sticking out from under her house. They had ruby boots on them, and the socks had a black and white stripped pattern on them, suddenly, the boots vanished, and the feet began to curl up and retreat underneath the house. She then heard grunts and gurgling coming from the other Black Arms. They were pointing at her shoes. Cheese looked down and gasped.

"Chao! Chao, chao chao! (Holy crap! Cream, you're wearing those boots)!" exclaimed Cheese.

"What is it Cheese?" asked Cream.

"Chao, chao (look down, dunce)." Cheese said as he pointed to the boots. Cream finally looked down and saw that she was indeed, wearing the exact same boots that were on the feet that just curled up under her house.

"You killed her …" said Black Doom finally. The rest of the black arms began jumping up and down and giving off demonic squeals and grunts. Cream thought she did something bad.

"I didn't mean to!" she said back, but then Black Doom hugged her. Now she was really scared.

"She's dead! Hooray!" Black Doom then dropped Cream and floated off to the center of town. "My fellow Black Arms, the wicked witch is dead!" The Black Arms that weren't already outside came out of their houses at that moment and began cheering and dancing. They did both quite poorly, I might add.

"Who's the wicked witch?" asked Cream.

"She was the one who terrorized us when we first moved here." said Black Doom.

"What did she do?" asked Cream.

"Well, let us just say that she did things more horrible than what you did to Jim," said Black Doom, gesturing over to the green puddle.

Cream and Cheese were then dragged into the center of town by a soldier and raised onto the shoulders of a rather muscular alien.

"These are our saviors …" Black Doom leaned over to Cream, "What are you called?"

"Cream the Rabbit." said Cream.

"And you?" said Black Doom as he leaned towards Cheese.

"Chao (The Terminator)." said Cheese.

"… our saviors, Cream the Rabbit and Chao!" finished Black Doom.

"Chao chao (Stupid alien)." mumbled Cheese.

They paraded Cream and Cheese around for a little bit until Black Doom announced, "Let us now present them with our finest Black Arms delicacy!"

Then three Black Arms stepped away from the crowd, each dressed in a vest. The first had a red vest, the second a blue, and the third a green vest. They began dancing and singing, but it sounded more like a dog and a cat tied up in a bag and beaten with a mace. After the singing, they presented Cream with what looked like a overstuffed rat foaming at the mouth, impaled on a stick.

"Uhh … thanks?" said Cream, as she took the "delicacy", and she discretely threw it over her shoulder when a giant pink bubble came floating out of the sky. It then stopped on the ground and popped, revealing a panting pink hedgehog in a poofy pink dress with a wand in her hand.

" It's so hard to breathe in there," she said.

"Um … who are you?" asked Cream.

"She's Amy, the whiny witch," said Black Doom.

"That's GOOD witch. G-O-O-D, got that, Doom?" said Amy.

"See? Whiny." said Black Doom. Amy began to growl, and her wand then turned into a piko piko hammer and she began beating Black Doom over the head with. When she stopped, her hammer turned back into a wand and Black Doom lay unconscious on the road.

"Anyway, why are you here?" asked Cream.

"Well, I came here to see who you were, and to make sure those boots are safe." began Amy, "So, are you a good witch, or a bad witch?" asked Amy.

"I'm not a witch at all." replied Cream.

"Chao (I beg to differ)," mumbled Cheese.

"Why would you want to make sure the boots are safe?" asked Cream. As Amy was about to answer, a giant black column of smoke erupted from the ground where Jim used to stand. As the smoke cleared, Cream's stomach lurched because Rouge the Bat stood where the smoke appeared.

"Hmm, Throwing a party, huh? And you didn't even invite me?" she said. She took a step, but then slipped on the slime below her and she fell right on her butt. All the Black Arms started to laugh until she shot a red beam at a few of them and turned them into the green puddles that Jim became. She then stood up, "I thought you all knew better than to laugh at me." Black Doom then regained consciousness. Upon sighting Rouge, he immediately floated upright.

"What do you want, boobs?" said Black Doom.

"I just came to get what's rightfully mine," replied Rouge, "And by the way, it's the wicked witch to you."

"But isn't she dead?" said Cream. Rouge then turned her head to look at Cream for the first time.

"What?" said Rouge.

"Well, she just got crushed under my house when I landed here," replied Cream. Rouge then walked over to the house and inspected it all around the perimeter. Then she quickly walked around it again.

"Where are they?" she said to herself, looking frantically all around the house. "Where are those damn boots?"

"You mean these?" said Amy, gesturing to the boots on Cream's feet. Rouge then spun around to look and gasped as she saw the boots on Cream.

"How did you get those?" asked Rouge quickly.

"I don't know! They just appeared on my feet." said Cream.

"Liar!" snapped Rouge. "How dare you steal from the wicked witch of the west!" Cream began to cry at this.

"I put them there." said Amy. Rouge and Cream turned to look at Amy.

"What?" they both asked.

"Yes. I put them there so you couldn't get a hold of them," announced Amy, "And you won't be able to take them off of her, either." Rouge began to growl slightly, but them regained her composure.

"Don't worry, little rabbit. I'll get those boots off for you," She said. Then she pounced at Cream, but then Cheese intervened and latched onto Rouge's face. "AHH! Get this thing off me!" she screamed.

"Chao chao chao (I want to finish off Cream)!" squealed Cheese. Then Rouge pried off Cheese and chucked him at Cream.

"I'll get you my pretty, and your little chao too!" shouted Rouge. Then a puff of smoke surrounded her. When it cleared, she was gone.

"How am I suppose to get these off?" asked Cream. Amy simply shrugged.

"I don't know. One way would be to get killed," Amy said.

"Chao chao (I can do that)!"exclaimed Cheese.

"Cheese it right. That's a bit drastic," said Cream. Cheese frowned and crossed his arms.

"You could always go ask The Eggman in Emerald City," said Amy.

"How do we get to The Eggman?" asked Cream.

"That is quite simple," interjected Black Doom, "you follow the yellow brick road. Not the orange brick road though. That's the highway to hell." he said.

"Will he help me figure out how to get home, too?" asked Cream.

"You mean you're not from around here?" asked Amy.

"Well, even I found that as obvious," said Black Doom. That got him another beating from Amy.

"I better get going then," said Cream.

"Good luck!" cheered Amy. She then returned to beating up Black Doom. The rest of the Black Arms cheered and waved good bye and then they tried to get Amy off of their leader.

"Well, here we go, Cheese!" said Cream, and she began skipping down the winding yellow brick road towards Emerald City.

XXX

Rouge watched the rabbit in her crystal ball as she skipped happily down the road, clutching the chao in her hand, nearly squeezing the life out of it.

"So, she's going to Emerald City to see The Eggman, eh?" said Rouge to herself, "We'll see about that. SHADOW!" she shouted. Then a winged black hedgehog entered the room, a bored expression on his face. His blood red eyes stared at Rouge.

"What is it, Rouge?" asked Shadow.

"Don't call me that! I'm the wicked witch now, remember?" she said.

"Whatever, Rouge," said Shadow. Rouge rolled her eyes at him and continued,

"I need you to round up the clones. We're probably going to go hunting soon," said Rouge.

"For what, may I ask?" asked Shadow.

"Rabbits." finished Rouge. She then began to laugh maniacally.

"… but rabbits are out of season right now," said Shadow. Rouge paused and looked at Shadow.

"Do you think I care?" she said. Shadow didn't answer. "I didn't think so. Now go!" She commanded. Shadow left the tower and sighed.

"They're not going to like this," said Shadow, as he went to the strip club down the hall to go gather his clones, for he knew that most of them were there. "They hate it when they're deprived of there strippers, stupid perverted clones," he said to himself. 'What does Rouge want with rabbits, anyway?' He finally reached the entrance to the club and he stepped in to go fetch his clones for Rouge- err … the wicked witch.

…

**So Cream and Cheese have finally made it to Oz (took me long enough), and also I've introduced the side story of Rouge the wicked witch and her plotting to get the boots off of Cream. Just so you know, there will be some Shadouge fluff later and some onesided knuxouge as well. So if Shadouge isn't your thing, you could probably just skip those parts, they don't affect the story much ...**

**Just giving you guys a heads up! -in Mario voice- See you next time!**


	4. Stupid Scarecrow Sidekicks

**Well, I've got anudder chappy for you! This one is a lot shorter than the last chapter, so you won't have to read for too long. I'm trying to stay 2 chapters ahead typed then the ones I've got posted, so I don't end up slacking off for a month and then randomly begin to type the story again. Strike while the iron's hot, they say, but wouldn't that hurt if you struck the iron while it's hot? Or even when it's cold, for that matter ... sorry, I rambled again. **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer (since I forgot last chapter): I don't own Sonic the Hedgehog, or any related characters. They are copyright to Sega. I didn't make The Wizard of Oz. I wasn't even alive when they made it. I think MGM owns the rights to it. Could someone tell me? Oops, rambling again ... sorry ...**

Chapter **4 !!!!!1!!1!!11!!!11!!! **_Stupid Scarecrow Sidekicks_

Cream was skipping along the yellow brick road, tightly holding onto Cheese. A little too tightly. He was already purple in the face and his tongue was lolling from his mouth. Suddenly, they came to a fork in the road. One road was yellow, the other was orange. "Now, what did Black Doom say?" pondered Cream. All she really remembered about what he said was "orange brick road", so she thought she was suppose to go that way. As she set her foot on the road, though …

"Don't go that way!" a voice hollered. Cream spun around and dropped Cheese, but the only thing in sight was the corn field around her and a scarecrow standing in the field.

"Chao (Ow)!" said Cheese.

"Who said that?" she asked.

"I did!" The voice came from the corn field.

"Show yourself!" said Cream.

"Can't you see me? I'm right here!" the voice said. Cream stood there, dumbfounded.

"Chao chao, chao (It's the scarecrow, dumb ass)!" yelled Cheese. He was pointing at the scarecrow.

"You think if was the scarecrow? You're silly, Cheese!" Said Cream. She patted the chao on the head as it sat on the ground, pouting, and planning how to impale Cream on the fencepost.

"Actually, he's right," said the voice again. Cream looked at the scarecrow and noticed that it looked a lot like Sonic. "I am the scarecrow." Cream jumped when she saw it's mouth move and tried to find a place to hide. "Don't be frightened, little rabbit, I wouldn't hurt you even if I could move!" he said, trying to stop Cream from being afraid.

"You can't move?" asked Cream.

"Nope! I've been tied up here pretty much my whole life after the farmer broke my legs. I think he abandoned me. It's probably because I'm a lousy scarecrow. I can't even scare them away! It's like I attract crows or something" he said. As if on cue, a flock of crows swooped down and began pecking at him. "AAAHHH!!! The pain!!!" he screamed, then his arm fell off of him and the crows picked it up and carried it away, "No! My arm! Bring that back!" he yelled after the crows. They then flew back over his head and dropped his arm on him. He sighed and sewed the appendage back on, and then started to cry.

"Aw … don't be sad mister Scarecrow," said Cream, "We'll get you down!"

"sniff R- Really?" he asked.

"Sure! Then you can move again," Cream said happily, "We just need something that can cut you down. Cream then looked over at Cheese, who was inching towards her with his trust knife, which he then hid behind his back, but not quick enough. "Hey, Cheese! You found a knife! We'll use that to cut mister Scarecrow down!" Cream exclaimed. Cheese silently cursed Cream under his breath as he gave the knife to Cream. "Thank you, Cheese!"

"Chao (Screw you)!" said Cheese. Cream then flew up to Scarecrow and cut his legs loose, and then his arms, and accidentally cut off one of Scarecrow's arms in the process. "Ahh! Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Oh, blood is everywhere!" Cream kept on going on like this for a few minutes while Scarecrow just simply picked up his arm and started stuffing and sewing it back on.

"Um … scarecrows don't bleed …" said Scarecrow.

Cream slowly calmed down and realized this, "Oh …" Cheese promptly slapped himself in the forehead. How, how could anyone be such an idiot? "Well, are you all right?" she asked Scarecrow.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine," he said. Cream stood there staring at him as awkward silence filled the air. "Uh … could you help me up? I haven't really walked that much." Cream walked over and grabbed him by the arm. When she tugged on his arm, it ripped right off.

"Ahh! Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Oh, blood is everywhere!" screamed Cream again. She dropped Scarecrow's arm and began running all around the place screaming her head off. Scarecrow then picked up his arm again, stuffed it, and sewed it back on.

"Um … little rabbit?" Scarecrow began to say, but then Cream remembered that scarecrows don't bleed.

"Oh, right …" she said. She started to walk over to the scarecrow.

"No! Don't come over here! Don't touch me!" he said. Cream stopped walking and looked at him funny. "Uh … I can do it myself now, I don't need your help." he said quickly. He then reached for the poll he was previously tied to and tried to pull himself up, but he lacked the upper arm strength to do so. On his second attempt, both his arms were torn right from his body and remained clutching onto the poll.

Cream then screamed, "Ahh! Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Oh, blood is everywhere!"

Scarecrow just stared at her as she ran around, screaming her head off again as Cheese slapped his forehead. "… could you grab my arms for me, little chao?" Scarecrow asked Cheese. Cheese stared at the being for a few minutes. He was contemplating whether to really help the guy or just stand there and stare at him mindlessly. He had chosen the latter. Scarecrow sighed, "I'll never get out of this corn field," he mused. Then Cream suddenly stopped screaming and put a hand on her chin while thinking.

"I could just drag you along with us until you remember how to walk again," said Cream slowly. Scarecrow was slightly surprised at this revelation. Did she think he was a cripple? No way he'd be dragged around like a rag doll!

XXX

Cream was skipping down the road again, with Cheese's throat clutched in one hand, and Scarecrow's throat in the other, "You weren't gonna be dragged around, huh? Well, look at you now! At least you don't have lungs, like the chao over there. Poor chao," Scarecrow mumbled to himself.

"Did you say something mister Scarecrow?" asked Cream.

"Um, no, nothing!" replied the scarecrow that was Sonic's double. 'Whew, that was close,' he thought to himself.

"Okay then!" said Cream. Then as she began skipping again, Scarecrow began to wonder something.

"Uh, where are you going?" he asked Cream.

"I'm off to see The Eggman so he can take these boots off of me and possibly send me back home!" she replied.

"If he can send you home, can he give me a brain?" he asked.

"Chao chao chao (I don't think you're the one who needs a brain)," muttered Cheese.

"Why do you need a brain? Don't you already have one?" asked Cream back.

"Well … I don't know. I don't have any other body parts," he replied, "Also, I need to learn how to walk again. Maybe The Eggman can help with that too!" he stated.

"We'll have to get there as fast as we can then!" proclaimed Cream, and she began to skip faster down the yellow brick road.

XXX

Rouge … err, I mean, The Wicked Witch … was sitting on the couch in her tower room watching The Devil Wears Prada and eating popcorn. The bat was incredibly bored because Shadow hadn't come back yet from his latest assignment. "I hope they didn't get him drunk and make him make-out with other drunk clones again. I'll probably never hear from him again if that happens." Rouge said to herself. She sighed and glanced over at her crystal ball, and then noticed that it was showing the little rabbit again. Rouge quickly got up to go investigate. "Oh, so she's picked up a friend, has she?" she said to herself.

"Doesn't that guy look familiar?"

Rouge let out a short scream and turned around to find Shadow standing directly behind her. "Don't … DO THAT!" shouted Rouge.

"Do what?" asked Shadow. Rouge knew he knew what she meant, but he was just being a smart ass. She sighed and turned back to the crystal ball.

"Where were you? It usually doesn't take this long for you to do a simple task," she said.

"Well, I went to the strip club to go collect my clones, when one of them talked me into getting a drink, and …" Shadow paused and squinted his eyes as he tried to remember the rest.

"Weeeeeell?" an annoyed Rouge said.

"… the rest is kind of a blur to me …" he said, "I think I was making out with some chick,"

"Yeah, chick, you keep thinking that," mumbled Rouge. "Anyway, what were you saying?" she said.

Shadow then stepped closer to Rouge and looked over her shoulder. "I thought that that scarecrow looked familiar," he said. Rouge took a look at the doll Cream was dragging around.

"Yeah, isn't that the scarecrow that was running around here a while ago?" mentioned Rouge.

"Oh yeah!" said Shadow, "That's the one the clones enchanted with your magic. I had to catch him and break his legs so he'd stop moving. Then I put him in that corn field." he finished.

"How did he escape?" pondered Rouge.

"Um … doesn't it seem obvious?" asked Shadow. Rouge then turned her head to look at Shadow and noticed how close he was standing to her. She blushed and pushed him away slightly.

"It doesn't matter. As long as she doesn't free that annoying lumberjack we won't have to worry." she told Shadow.

"Uh, it looks like they're heading towards the forest we hid him in," Observed Shadow.

"No matter. The bunny is just a stupid twit. The chao is probably doing all the work," said Rouge.

"Weren't you suppose to be watching her?" asked Shadow.

"And aren't YOU suppose to be gathering your clones?!" Rouge retorted. She then picked up Shadow by the scruff of his neck and flung him out the door. What followed was a series of crashes and strings of curse words. Those were proceeded by the slamming of a door. Rouge then went straight back to the couch to continue watching her movie. She was not in the mood to deal with Cream right now, and hoped that the trees in the forest would deal with her, or possibly the hot-tempered lumberjack.

…

**So Cream has found one of the sidekicks already! Whohoo! What other strange fellows will they meet on their way to see the Eggman? Will Rouge ever get and competent sevants? More on that next chapter ;)**


	5. An Axe Man With Anger Issues

**Tadaa! Another Chappy for you! This Chapter is a little longer than the last one, and some more romance goes on here, but there's always the funny! Can't forget the funny. If I do forget the funny, remind me to put it back in, okay? **

**Enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Sonic the Hedgehog or any related characters. They are (c) of Sega, kind of like how I want to copyright "Bickles" (See profile page) . The Wizard of Oz is not owned by me, it's owned by ... someone ... Anyway, I will claim ownership of the two Shadow clones that appear in this chapter. They are unnamed as of now ...**

Chapter **5 !!!!!1!!!11!!!!!1! **_An Axe-Man With Anger Issues_

The small party had stopped on the edge of an orchard to take a rest and to sew Scarecrow's arms back on. Unfortunately, Cream sewed them on backwards. "Oops, sorry mister Scarecrow," apologized Cream. Scarecrow sighed.

"It's okay, I guess," he said the last part under his breath so Cream couldn't hear him. Cheese on the other hand was enjoying the fresh air that was entering his lungs. He would not be able to live through another trip like that. He was trying to figure out how to convince Cream not to latch onto his neck to carry him. But before he could contemplate that, Cream was unknowingly strangling her pet chao again and dragging the scarecrow into the orchard.

"Chao chao, chao, chao (I promise you, Cream, you will pay)!" sputtered Cheese as he was slowly choking to death. Of course, Cream was oblivious to Cheese's pain, and continued skipping along, but Scarecrow noticed that Cheese was turning purple.

"Uh, isn't it bad for chao to change colors?" asked the scarecrow.

"Oh, he's been doing that since we got here. I think it's because the author doesn't know what color Cheese is suppose to be, so she keeps going between purple and blue." explained Cream.

"Author? Now I'm really confused, what are you talking about?" said Scarecrow with a puzzled look on his face. The Author, by the way, felt very insulted, and stormed off in a huff.

"Never mind, it's really complicated fourth wall stuff," replied Cream. Cheese had since stopped struggling in Cream's grip. No, he's not dead yet, he has just become dumbfounded by Cream's clueless ness again. And like last time, he was violently attacking Cream in his head as his outward appearance reflected an unconscious person.

"Um … okay then," said Scarecrow. As he mentioned before, he's been lost since the word 'author', and decided that it would be best if he didn't continue with the conversation. Cream smiled at him and continued skipping merrily down the road into the orchard. Unbeknownst to them, they were being watched.

XXX

The trio had decided to take a rest in the middle of the 'orchard', which turned out to be a dense forest. "I thought that this was just an orchard," thought Cream aloud.

"Yeah, it certainly looked that way at the entrance," Scarecrow agreed. He was sitting on a rock next to Cream as Cheese lie on the ground, gasping for air.

"I'm hungry, let's go pick some apples!" said Cream. She got up and skipped over to the apple tree in front of them. As she grasped an apple though,

"Hey, watch it!" yelled a voice. Cream jumped away from the tree and looked around.

"Who's there?" she said.

"Who do you think you are, thief? You can't have my apples!" The voice said.

"What do you mean? Who are you?" asked Cream.

"The tree, you idiot!" Cream turned around and noticed that the tree now had a face, a very gnarled and angry face, that wasn't there before. It had no real eyes, but it had holes where eyes should go, a knot for a nose, and some twisted bark that curved to form a mouth. "And you can't have my apples!" he finished.

"Please, mister tree. We're really hungry and would just like to have a couple of your apples," explained Cream.

"Chao (Who's we)?" said Cheese bitterly.

"Then grow your own apples! These ones are mine!" barked the tree. At that moment, people around the world groaned at the horrible pun. Meanwhile, an apple had hit Cream right on the back of her head. She let out a yelp and turned around to see who threw it.

"Here, you want our apples, take them!" a voice hollered, and another apple came flying through the air at Cream. This apple hit her in the arm.

"Cream! We have to get out of here!" Shouted Scarecrow. An apple then hit him in the head and knocked him off the rock he was sitting on.

"Then GET OUT!" yelled a nearby tree, as more apples began to fly through the air. Cream ran over to Cheese and scooped him up, but couldn't find Scarecrow.

"Mister Scare- Ow!" hollered Cream, as she was hit in the leg with another apple, causing her to fall over. Just then, a blue blur rushed after Cream and picked her up, and vanished as quickly as it came.

Cream looked up at her savior and noticed that it was, "Mister Scarecrow!" she exclaimed upon seeing his face. He winked at her and then abruptly stopped. "You can run, now!" she stated.

"Yup!" was all he could say, before falling flat on his back.

"Oh! Are you okay?" Cream asked while helping Scarecrow back to his feet.

"Yeah. I'm just kind of tired," he replied. While pulling him up, Scarecrow's arm ripped off yet again and he fell to the ground with a thud. Scarecrow and Cheese braced themselves for Cream's screams and claims of blood everywhere, but they didn't hear anything except,

"Oh dear, it fell off again, huh?" said Cream in a rather calm voice, "Well, you sew it on, and lets get going." she finished. Cream dropped Scarecrow's arm onto him and picked up Cheese by the throat again. "Why were those trees so mean to us, anyway?" asked Cream as Scarecrow stitched his arm back on.

"They must have been crab apple trees," replied Scarecrow. The author was then flamed for putting another terrible pun into the story, but she tried to tell the people that Sonic is sort of cheesy like that, but they didn't listen. Cream then looked around to try and figure out where they were when she spotted a figure a little ways up the road.

"Hey look!" she said as she pointed in the figure's direction, "There's someone there!" Scarecrow turned to look in the direction Cream pointed in, whilst Cheese was trying to escape Cream's grip again.

"Hmm … maybe they know the way out of here." said Scarecrow. They began to walk down the road towards it. When they got there they noticed that it was not exactly a person, but a creature made out of tin that Cream noticed resembled Knuckles. He was frozen in place, holding his axe as that was stuck in the stump in front of him, while a beer can was sitting on the stump next to his axe. It appeared that he was chopping wood before he became stuck.

"Oh, it's just a statue," said a disappointed Cream. As they got closer, they could hear noises coming from the "statue".

"Are you trying to say something?" asked the scarecrow. The tin man (or rather, echidna, but man is much easier to type) then sounded like he was screaming at Scarecrow, but his mouth was shut, so they couldn't understand him.

"… meer … phan …" said the tin man.

"Meerkat?" asked Scarecrow. This guy had him stumped. The tin man screamed at him again.

"Chao! Chao chao (No! Beer can)!" shouted Cheese while pointing to the beer can next to the tin man's axe.

"You think he wants beer, Cheese?" asked Cream. Cheese nodded frantically, and then Cream let go of him to go grab the beer can.

"Oh, I know! A Mirror-Fan!" said Scarecrow excitedly, he thought he finally had it right. The tin man began to scream even louder and began rocking back and forth slightly. Cream then walked up to him and opened his mouth slightly and poured in the beer. The Tin Man paused for a little bit.

"Mirror-Fan?" the tin figure said softly, but then he shouted, "MIRROR-FAN?! What the hell is a mirror fan? I should rip you apart for your stupidity!"

"Well, I don't have a brain, so I think my idiocy is justified." Replied Scarecrow.

"If you don't have a brain, how can you know big words like 'justified'?" asked the tin man. The author then erased this argument from their memories so the plot hole could not be discovered. All four of them stood there, staring a one another.

"Hey, I can move again!" Exclaimed the tin man.

"Why were you stuck that way, Mister Tin Man?" asked Cream.

"The wicked witch's flying hedgehog put a spell on me while I was working, so I wouldn't be able to sneak over to the witch's anymore." Grumbled Tin Man.

"Why would you go over to her place anyway? She's so mean!" said Cream, quite confused.

"We kinda had a thing going on. I was so close to getting some from her." explained Tin Man, " But apparently, her stoolie was getting jealous, and put a spell on me to keep me from getting to her. Stupid Hedgehogs …" Tin Man mumbled under his breath so Scarecrow couldn't hear the last part.

"What were you trying to get?" asked Cream innocently.

"I was trying to fu-" began Tin Man, but then his mouth stopped moving, so he reached over to get the beer can.

"I don't think she needs to hear that …" began Scarecrow. Tin Man had sipped the beer and looked over at Scarecrow.

"She's gonna learn about it eventually. Why not now?" suggested Tin Man.

"Well, I don't think she's old enough to understand those things yet," said Scarecrow.

"She's like, 13 isn't she?" wondered Tin Man.

"I'm only 6, mister Tin Man." answered Cream.

"Oh! … yeah, you're a little young …" said a shocked Tin Man. An awkward silence filled the air. "So, um … what are you guys doing here, anyway?" asked Tin Man.

"We're off to see the Eggman!" Announced Cream. "I'm hoping that he'll be able to send me and Cheese home to Station Square!" she finished.

"Chao chao chao (I hope he gives me a machete)!" said Cheese.

"I'm going to ask him for a brain!" interjected Scarecrow.

"Hmm … you think he could give me a heart?" wondered Tin Man.

"Why would you need a heart, Mister Tin Man?" asked Cream.

"Well, if I had a heart, I could kill that flying hedgehog and get the witch to come back to me!" explained Tin Man. Awkward silence filled the air once again.

"… I don't really see how that works out. Why would you need a heart for that?" asked Scarecrow.

"None of your business! If I think it'll work, it'll work!" yelled Tin Man angrily.

"Then lets get out of here! This forest is starting to get really creepy." suggested Cream.

Tin Man mumbled something under his breath again, but when everyone else left, he followed. Then there was a rustling in the bushes.

"Did you hear that?" asked Cream, who began looking around.

"Nope, probably the wind." said Scarecrow cheerily.

"Hmm …" said Tin Man. The group continued their way along the yellow bricked path paved beneath them.

XXX

Rouge the Bat was taking a nap on her couch, snoring quite loudly, when there was a horrendous banging noise coming from the window that woke her up. "Urhh, what now?" said a very annoyed Rouge. She rolled off the couch and let out a squeal when she landed face first on the floor. She forced herself to get up as the banging noise from the window grew louder and more frenzied. The banging was also accompanied by yells. "Shut up! I'm coming!" Rouge screamed at the window. The banging and shouts still continued however, and Rouge eventually got to the windows and flung them open. She looked out and noticed that no one was there. "God damn it!" She yelled, but then 2 flying hedgehogs with similar markings to Shadow appeared in the open window while rubbing their heads.

"Ow, that hurt," said the one with deep blue markings.

"Why the hell are you disturbing me!" yelled Rouge, which made the winged hedgies flinch.

"Sorry, wicked witch, but it's an emergency!" proclaimed the one with fluorescent yellow markings.

"Well, I'm waiting …" said Rouge, tapping her foot impatiently. The two hedgehogs turned to each other.

"I think we should handle this delicately, you know. Kind of bring it on slowly so she isn't that mad about it. And then she might not tell Captain about it because then he'll go ballistic, so let me do all the talking," whispered the fluorescent-marked hedgie.

"Yeah, okay." agreed the dark blue-marked one. They both then turned to Rouge, and as the fluorescent marked one opened his mouth, he heard his partner blurt out:

"The rabbit freed the lumberjack and now they're off to see The Eggman!" he said all in one breath. Rouge's face drained of all it's blood as she took in the information. Meanwhile, the dark blue marked hedgehog was receiving a series of blows to the head from his companion.

"I told you to let me do all the talking!" he yelled at him.

"I'm sorry! The pressure to be silent was too much!" sobbed the other. "Hey. Where'd the witch go?" The fluorescent striped hedgehog stopped the beating and looked around the room as well and noticed that Rouge was in fact not there anymore.

"I … don't know …" he replied.

"Hey, let's get out of here before she comes back. She's probably getting a mace or something to beat us with." suggested the dark blue-marked hedgie.

"Yeah, let's go!" agreed the other. They both jumped off the window ledge and flew off to the bar. At that moment, Rouge came back in to the room with Shadow following closely behind her.

"… and they said that Cream had- … where did those two go?!" Rouge said, exasperated.

"Don't worry. Just check the crystal ball and find out yourself." suggested Shadow.

"Oh, right. I have a crystal ball," she said partly to herself. They walked over to the crystal ball in the middle of the room and gazed into it, only to find out that the two hedgehogs were telling the truth. "Oh, crap! She really did break the spell! She's a lot smarter than I give her credit for," Rouge mused.

"What are your orders, Rouge?" asked Shadow. He was standing directly behind her again, a little too close for Rouge. She turned around blushed slightly when she realized this.

"Uhm … well …" she sputtered out as Shadow wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to his body. She looked into his eyes and leaned in closer to him. Their lips were about to meet when suddenly,

"Captain! We finished building that robo-" started one of the cloned hedgehogs who just burst though the doorway, but then it stopped and gawked at Shadow and Rouge, who were entangled in each other. "Uhh, am I interrupting something?' asked the clone. Shadow had let go of Rouge and unwound himself from her form.

"What were you saying, Midnight?" asked Shadow, sounding as if nothing had happened.

"Uh, oh yeah! We finished that indestructible robot that you asked us to build." replied the winged hedgehog.

"Good, bring it in," commanded Shadow. The clone saluted and left the doorway. Then several hedgehogs came in through the door, wheeling in a giant robot on a dolly. They unhinged it from the dolly and set it onto the ground so it was standing upright. The robot was mostly black with red trimming on it, and has the omega symbol on each shoulder.

"Robot?" asked Rouge. She was staring at the giant hunk of metal that was only a couple of inches from the ceiling.

"Yes. I had my clones build a robot to go after Cream for you, incase she released the lumberjack." explained Shadow. He turned to the robot. "Activate, Omega." The robot's eyes flashed a bright red.

"Systems rebooting. System analysis complete." proclaimed Omega in a monotone voice.

"Your target is Knuckles the Tin Man. You must annialate him." explained Shadow. Rouge watched in awe as a satellite dish unfolded from the robot's head and began spinning around.

"Target located." cried Omega. The robot then sprang to life and began charging at the wall. Omega then crashed through the wall and began hurtling towards the earth. Rouge and Shadow ran to the hole in the wall and looked down in time to see Omega collide with the ground below and promptly explode into a million pieces. Rouge then looked at Shadow.

"I guess it wasn't so indestructible, huh?" asked Rouge. Shadow was still staring at the smoking pile of twisted metal that used to be Omega. Shadow then turned to look at his clones, but they had already left. For once in his life, Shadow was at a loss for words. Tears began to stream down his face, mixing with the blood that poured from the wound on his cheek. Rouge then realized that Shadow got stabbed with a piece of flying metal. She "gently" yanked the shard from his face, which made Shadow give out a terrible yelp. "Sorry, I didn't notice it." she said while she shoved a towel onto the wound to slow the bleeding.

"Next time, I'll have to make the robot smarter, too." said Shadow. He was incredibly embarrassed that Rouge saw that poor excuse for a robot.

'Poor Shadow,' Rouge thought to herself, 'It'll all be worth it once I get those boots from that wretched little rabbit.' she thought bitterly. Rouge sat Shadow on the couch, tending to his wound, while the clones were all down at the club, spreading rumors that Shadow and Rouge were "totally into each other", and in the crystal ball, the gang was skipping merrily thought the thick forest. Well, Cream and Scarecrow were skipping. Cheese was suffocating in Cream's grip and Tin Man was trudging along behind them, plotting ways to kill Shadow.

…

**I smell a battle brewing! ... no ... that's my dad ... ew ... **

**You'll definetely a little more of Tin Man's obsession next chapter, and hopefull the third sidekick! Hopefully you haven't lost interest yet and will be looking forward to the next chapter. See you there!**

**Edit: I just watched The Wizard of Oz again and I realized that I have swiched around some events in the story. I'm too lazy to go back and fix them, so bare with me. I'll try and keep the events after chapter 6 in order.**


	6. The NotSoFerocious Fox

**Hewwo! Sorry I took a while to update. To be honest, I don't really have any excuse for it. I was just really lazy :P Anyway, this one is a loooooooong one, so you should get yourself a drink and some popcorn. The next chapter will be a lot shorter. As always,**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own nothin' here, I think you can all understand that by now :P**

Chapter **6 !!11!!!1!!11!!! **_The Not-So-Ferocious Fox_

The quartet was traveling along the yellow brick road once again after a quick potty break for Cream and some quality breathing time for Cheese. They traveled deeper and deeper into the woods, noticing that the trees just got denser the farther they traveled.

"Mister Tin Man, do you know how much farther we have to go?" asked Cream politely.

"How the hell should I know?" said a disgruntled Tin Man.

"Well, I thought that since you were in this forest for a while, you knew the way." explained Cream.

"I've been frozen in that spot for three years. Even if I knew, I would've forgotten by now!" he shouted at Cream. Cream cringed at the sound of his voice yelling at her.

"I'm sorr-"

"I don't need your pity!" he spat at Cream, "I don't even know why I even came with you guys in the first place!" he said angrily to the sky as he shook his fist in the air.

"Because we said we were going to The Eggman to get things and you wanted a heart to try and fulfill your twisted fantasy?" questioned Scarecrow all too cheerfully. Tin Man was opening and closing his mouth for a few seconds.

"… Not a finger!" was all that Tin Man could reply. The three of them stared at him for a moment, until Cream tripped over something and Cheese let out a squeal as he was crushed under Cream's body.

"Cream! Are you okay?" asked Scarecrow, helping Cream up after her fall.

"Yeah, I think so … EEEEK!!" she screamed as she leapt back a few feet and pointed shakily at the object she tripped over.

"Wow …" was Tin Man's reply as they stared at a giant pile of bones that lay sideways on the road. They appeared to belong to some sort of bovine at one time. "How did you guys not notice **that** while we were walking up here!" said Tin Man as he pointed at it too.

"We were staring at you after you said 'not a finger!', remember?" Scarecrow pointed out.

" … shut up …" Tin Man muttered. Cheese finally peeled himself off of the road and stood up.

"Chao chao? Chao (What am I? Chopped liver)!" he yelled angrily at the trio who were all gawking at the carcass in the middle of the road. Cheese's yell didn't even faze them. "Chao chao. Chao chao chao chao (Stupid animals. I should just finish you all off now) …" Cheese muttered.

"Cheese! You're okay!" shouted Cream upon sighting Cheese. Cheese froze in place as Cream ran towards him and tripped over the bones again, also re-squishing Cheese as she fell flat on her face.

"Uh, Cream?" asked Scarecrow, concerned for the little rabbit as he hoped this didn't end up like the time his arm kept ripping off. Tin Man rolled his eyes.

"How do you trip over the same thing twice in a row?!" yelled the Tin Man. Cream then looked up and stared at the pile of bones.

"EEEEEK!" she shrieked as she leapt back a few feet again and pointed at the pile of bones shakily, confirming Scarecrow's fear.

"I think the real question is, how the heck did it get here?" said Scarecrow.

"Chao (Good point)." said Cheese.

"Why can't that thing speak?" asked Tin Man. Cheese just shot him a dirty look.

"Maybe it was a lion …" thought Scarecrow out loud.

"Or a tiger …" added Tin Man.

"Chao chao (Or a zombie) …" thought Cheese.

"Yes, Cheese. It could have been a bear!" said Cream. Cheese really wished that he had that Shadow Rifle right now. Cream grabbed Cheese by the throat again and huddled close to Scarecrow.

"We should get going …" announced Scarecrow.

"Why? You aren't scared of some lions coming to eat you, are you?" asked Tin Man. Scarecrow began down the road again, not bothering to answer his comment. "Or maybe an ambush of tigers, ripping your stuffing apart," Scarecrow began walking faster. Tin Man followed closely behind. "Or maybe a killer grizzly bear coming out of the forest and snatching you up for lunch," Scarecrow walked faster still.

"Stop it!" pleaded Cream, but Tin Man was just having too much fun.

"Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! What will we do?" Asked Tin Man in a mock scared voice. Scarecrow was speed walking now, but Tin Man kept pace, all the while repeating, "Lions and tigers and bears, lions and tigers and bears, lions and tigers and bears, lions and tigers an-," Suddenly, a furred thing shot out from the bushes and roared at the company. They all screamed and Tin Man ran for the forest, instead running into a tree and being knocked out cold. The others were glued in place, quaking in fear. Cream then quickly threw whatever she had in her hand at the beast. That object turned out to be Cheese.

"Chaaaaooo (S-----------t)!"Screamed Cheese as he was hurtling through the air. The furred thing screamed at the sight of the flying chao and ran for the forest too, also running into a tree. It fell on it's back in time to see a cow fall from the branches of the tree and land on it with a thud. Cheese landed in a rosebush nearby. Scarecrow went over to revive Tin Man while Cream went over to fetch Cheese. Scarecrow pulled the beer can out of hammer space and poured the liquid down Tin Man's throat. He sprang back to life in an instant.

"What happened!? Where's my axe? Are you trying to hit on me?!" sputtered Tin Man as he backed up into the tree he ran into.

"Your welcome, Tin Man." said Scarecrow sarcastically. Cream was over by the cow that fell out of the tree, calling out for Cheese.

"Cheese, Cheese! Where are you, Cheese?" she yelled around. The aforementioned chao was hiding in the rosebush he fell in, keeping very quiet. It was uncomfortable, but if it meant one more minute of not being strangled, he would endure it.

"Chao chao chao chao? Chao, chao chao chao, chao chao chao(Why does she do these things to me? Sure, I'm trying to kill her, but that's only because)-" Cheese was whispering to himself, but he forgot that Cream could pick out his voice from a mile away, in the middle of a monster truck rally.

"There you are, Cheese!" announced Cream, who was very relieved to have found her dear little chao. Cheese, on the other hand, was very worried that she might kill him with one more of those choke holds before he could get her. Cream scooped up he chao in her arms and carried him over to where Scarecrow was talking to Tin Man.

"I can't believe that a cow fell out of the tree and squashed that thing." said Scarecrow incredulously.

"I can't believe I missed it!" said Tin Man angrily.

"Maybe we should go see if it's alright." said a now worried Cream.

"Oh no! We're not helping that thi-" began Tin Man, but Cream had already gone over by the cow. A little blood was pooling out from underneath the cow, but she could hear murmurings coming there too.

"I think it's still alive!" She shouted over to the other two. Scarecrow ran over to investigate while Tin Man trudged over to the cow.

"I think you're right, Cream. I can definitely hear something under there." agreed Scarecrow.

"Chao chao chao (I think you should let go of me now) …" mumbled Cheese.

"You're right, Cheese. We should get him out. Can anyone lift this cow?" asked Cream while Cheese sulked in her grip. Scarecrow shook his head.

"My arms would rip off again." Scarecrow explained.

"Well, I wouldn't want to brag, but …" began Tin Man, his pride obviously showing as he put his hands on his hips and puffed his chest out. He then began to flex his arms to show off his muscles. Scarecrow rolled his eyes as Cream watched in awe. Cheese was too busy mumbling to himself to notice anything.

"Does that mean you can lift this cow?" asked Cream.

"I could lift 3 cows if I wanted to." said Tin Man arrogantly. As if on cue, two more cows fell out of the tree and landed on top of the other cow. "Like I said. If I wanted to. I don't really feel like it." said Tin Man.

"Really? I don't think you can lift three cows." inquired Scarecrow.

"I'll show you!" replied Tin Man. He then stomped over to the stack of cows and lifted then over his head in a matter of seconds. As the others stared in awe, the furry that was previously trapped under the cows gasped for air.

"Oh, Thank you! I never thought tha- Wait!" he began to say before Tin Man dumped the pile of cows back onto him.

"Tin Man!" Cream scolded.

"Oh, alright!" replied Tin Man. He lifted the cows off of the furry again and set them down right next to him. Scarecrow went over to help up the furry. It had long, bushy hair sprouting from around it's neck, and had two long bushy tails. He reminded Cream of Tails.

"Thank you, all of you! I am the lion, king of the forest!" he proclaimed. Scarecrow noticed that the mane around his neck was a little loose.

'Hmm … I wonder why that is …' thought Scarecrow. He reached over and gave the mane a yank, only to find out that he had ripped the whole thing off. The gang stood frozen in place.

"Uhh … I can explain …" said "the lion".

XXX

"Grr! It's like she's an idiot attractor!" bellowed Rouge from her tower. She was hunched over her crystal ball, intently staring at the image of the group conversing with the fox that they just saved. "I'm going to have to show her who she's messing with." she said to herself. "Shadow!"

"Yes?"

"AAAAHHH!" Rouge screamed as she fell off of her stool and was caught by a pair of arms. Shadow had been standing right behind her. "How long were you there?" she asked him sheepishly as she realized he was holding her bridal style.

"Long enough to know that you were planning something." was his response. He appeared unfazed by the knowledge that Rouge was right in his arms. "What is it that you want?" he asked her. His scent slightly intoxicated her as she tried to think of the reason she wanted Shadow in the first place.

"I- I need you to watch over the castle. I'm going out." she replied. Shadow had set her back onto her feet.

"Where are you going, may I ask?" Shadow asked.

"To show that bunny who she's messing with!" said Rouge, regaining her composure. She went to get her broomstick as Shadow opened up the window for her. Rouge stepped up onto the window pane and assumed the proper riding position on her broomstick.

"Should I prepare the clones for battle?" he asked her. Rouge looked back at him and smiled.

"Nah. This shouldn't take long. I'm just going to scare her." she replied. Shadow nodded.

"Go get her." Shadow said, and he smacked Rouge's ass and she took off like a bottle rocket. Shadow smirked as he watched her fly off into the distance. He knew she'd punish him when she got back, but he thought it was worth it. He turned his attention to the group of now five as they walked along the road to Emerald City.

XXX

Cream was skipping along the road, linking arms with Scarecrow and Fox, or 'The Pussy' according to Tin Man, which Cream thought meant that he calls him a kitty. And what's so bad about being called a cat? Tin Man was trudging behind the rest of the group and Cheese was stuck in Cream's grasp yet again. It was getting easier to breath, thought Cheese, but he also thought they were being followed by a pretty dragon asking for pancakes. The group decided to take a rest in front of an old shed on the side of the road. Little did they know what was planned for them.

"I hope we reach The Eggman soon! I really need some courage." said Fox.

"Oh, waaah! Others have needs from The Eggman too, you know!" shouted Tin Man angrily.

"You should stop giving Fox a hard time, Tin Man. It's not his fault!" replied Cream.

"I think we should of left him under those cows for attacking us!" retorted Tin Man.

"Wow, maybe I won't have to attack you after all." said a voice. The gang looked at the roof of the barn and noticed that the wicked witch herself was standing on top of it. Cream gasped.

"The Wicked Witch!" she said obviously.

"Of course it's the Wicked Witch, you idiot! Who else would be as beautiful as her?" replied Tin Man.

"Oh kill me now …" she said bitterly. She forgot how enamored Tin Man was with her, and wished that she brought her bazooka with her too. Why did she fly with a broom anyway? Wasn't she a bat? She shook the questions from her head and noticed that the barn was shaking too.

"Come back to me, my love!" shouted Tin Man to her as he was shoving the barn back and forth.

"We never had anything, Tin Man! It was just a physical attraction! GET OVER IT!!!" Rouge screamed at the emotional tin echidna.

"You're lying! I know it! That stupid winged hedgehog must have hypnotized you!" said Tin Man, now on the brink of tears.

"Uh, Tin Man? Maybe you should calm down …" began Scarecrow, but then Tin Man froze in place.

"Scarecrow! Get me my beer!" Tin Man shouted to Scarecrow. Scarecrow began to reach into hammer space to get the beer can.

"Oh no you don't." said Rouge as she prepared for a spell. "How about a little fire, Scarecrow?!" she said and she flicked her wrist and Scarecrow burst into flames. He began to run around in circles, screaming incoherent words. Rouge cackled and wasn't paying any attention, so Cream ran over to Tin Man and poured the beer down his throat.

"Help Scarecrow!" she told him.

"How did you get the beer can?" asked Tin Man, but then Cream shoved Tin Man towards where Scarecrow was running.

"I'll save you, Scarecrow!" he proclaimed, and he took out his axe and began chopping Scarecrow to bits.

"You moron! Get water!" shouted Scarecrow as Tin Man continued to "help" him, bits of burning debris flying in every direction.

"I'll save you, Scarecrow!" said Fox, but as he ran over, a cow charged out of the forest and landed on him, rendering him immobile. Tin Man finally stopped chopping up Scarecrow long enough to see that the fire just got bigger.

"Water, WATER!!!!" screamed Scarecrow, now a stationary lump on the ground, still burning.

"I could put him out …" offered Rouge, who began paying attention again.

"Can you also get this cow off of me?" asked Fox, who managed to get his head and left arm out from under the cow.

"Don't push your luck." Rouge replied flatly. "All I need are those boots, my dear."

"I'll get the shiny boots for you!" Tin Man replied eagerly.

"Eh … sure." said Rouge. Tin Man then pounced on Cream and held her upside down, trying to yank the boots off.

"Chao chao (Cream's mine)!" shouted Cheese, who flew right at Tin Man's face and began attacking him. Tin Man ran around screaming, flailing his arms about whilst still clutching onto Cream's boot. Cream was screaming as well.

"Wow, and all I had to do is light someone on fire. This just keeps getting better and better …" Rouge said to herself while watching the scene unfold before her.

"You know that he won't get those boots off, right"? Rouge jumped and fell over as she noticed that she was no longer alone on the roof of the barn.

"Damn it, Shadow! Why do you always do that?" Rouge said to Shadow.

"No reason …" he said, as stony faced as usual. He offered his hand to Rouge, who shoved it away hastily.

"Don't touch me, you perv! I haven't forgotten what you did at the castle before I left." said an annoyed Rouge, who stood back up again.

"Believe me, Rouge, I haven't." Shadow replied as he smirked slightly.

"Hey!" came a voice from below. Rouge and Shadow looked over and noticed that Tin Man was now standing with Cream in one hand, and Cheese in the other, with a look of complete hatred and disgust on his face. "How dare you steal Rouge from me!" Tin Man shouted. He dropped Cream and Cheese and walked over to the barn.

"Steal? You never had her to begin with." pointed out Shadow.

"I SO did! We had a whole relationship and everything! And I was so close to fu-" began Tin Man.

"WHAT!" interrupted Rouge, "We never had anything, Tin Man! And you certainly are never going to get in my pants!" bellowed Rouge angrily. The three of them continued to argue amongst themselves while Fox had finally managed to crawl out from underneath the cow. He noticed that Scarecrow was still on fire, and ran over to help him, completely ignoring the bickering over by the barn.

"Don't worry, Scarecrow! I'll get you water!" declares Fox.

"Great. Could you get it, like … NOW!" screamed Scarecrow.

"Um … do you know where I could find it?" asked Fox.

"How should I know?! I'm on fire!" screamed Scarecrow. Fox then remembered something and pulled out his water bottle and dumped it all over Scarecrow, putting out the flames. "Aaaahhh. Finally." Scarecrow groaned. All of a sudden, they heard a giant explosion and a scream. Then Tin Man came flying towards them and smashed into another tree right next to them.

"Tin Man!" Cream screamed. The rest looked towards the barn and noticed that a black winged hedgehog was holding a smoldering bazooka.

"I think you've done enough damage." announced Shadow after a the long silence.

"… yeah, I'd have to agree with you." agreed Rouge, then she turned to Cream, "You better figure out how to get those boots to me, or else I'll do far more damage next time." Rouge announced while pointing at Cream. A plume of smoke erupted from where she stood, and when it cleared, she was gone. Shadow also disappeared in a flash of green light right after Rouge. Cream then ran over to Tin Man while Cheese sat up.

"Chao, chao chao, chao. chao chao chao (No, it's fine, Cream. I'll get up myself) …" Cheese grumbled as he flew over to everyone else. Cream quickly revived Tin Man by having him drink from the beer can. Tin Man sat up and looked around.

"Where'd Rouge go?" Tin Man asked, sounding hurt.

"She left. I don't see why you like her. She's really mean. And why did you attack me? I feel really hurt now because you betrayed us and you shou-" babbled Cream, but Tin Man stopped listening after 'she left'. Tin Man's eyes began to water and he broke down crying. The rest of the group just stated at him.

"…Should we start putting Scarecrow back together?" asked Fox.

"Good idea. Then we can help Tin Man with his emotional problems." declared Cream. Cream then took the sewing needle from the ashes of Scarecrow and began to sew what was left of him back together while Fox watched her admiringly, Cheese grumbled right next to her, and Tin Man bawled his eyes out.

…

**So all the idiots have come out to play now, and Rouge and Shadow have showed up, too! Will Tin Man ever repair his broken heart? Will they make it to The Eggman (that's kind of a given, but whatever)? Will Shadow get his way with Rouge ( that's probably a given too ;) )?**

**If you've watched The Wizard of Oz lately, you'll notice a couple things wrong with the chapters leading up to this. I am trying to make it all chronological from now on, so there. Thank you for reading, and hopefully you read all the way through this!**


	7. Touch Fuzzy, Get Wasted

**Sorry for being gone so long. Frankly, I just wasn't motivated to work on this story, so it took a while to feel like putting this chapter up. It is waaaaaaaay shorter (about a third of the length) than the last chapter, so you'll get a bit of a break before next chapter, which will be another long one, I think. **

**Enjoy!**

**Diclaimer: Blah Blah Blah see previous chapters Blah blah blah I do own Riku blah blah blah ...**

Chapter **7 !!!!!1!!!1!!!!1!!1 **_Touch Fuzzy, Get Wasted_

Rouge was once again hunched over her crystal ball, gazing at the image of the moron patrol skipping along the yellow bricked road while linking arms, acting as if she had never even attacked them. Even Tin Man was unusually cheery. That scared Rouge slightly. "Why isn't he curled up in the fetal position anymore?" she wondered out loud.

"You don't see why?" Rouge felt a sudden weight on her chest and looked down. She screamed when she noticed that Shadow's head was sticking out of her robe.

"GET OUT OF THERE!" Rouge screamed at Shadow. Shadow disappeared into her robe again, and came out from underneath it, a faint smile on his face.

"But seriously, Rouge, you don't notice that he's still crying?" asked Shadow calmly, acting as if he wasn't just in her robe a few seconds ago.

"Don't 'but seriously' me, Shadow! Why the hell were you in my robe?!" Rouge demanded. Shadow ignored her and continued on his subject.

"He's faking happiness because he thinks that everyone will stop bothering him about his obsession with you. It seems to have worked …" pondered Shadow.

"But that doesn't explain why you were inside my robe!" said Rouge. Shadow was silent for a moment.

"I … accidentally teleported into … there …" replied Shadow. He turned towards the crystal ball, away from Rouge so she couldn't see the newly formed blush on his face. Rouge stared at him for a couple seconds.

"What do you mean 'accidentally' ?! You don't just accidentally teleport inside someone's clothes! I should pound you into the flo-" Rouge ranted, but Shadow shushed her.

"They're almost to Emerald City. Shouldn't you do something?" he asked Rouge as he gestured towards the crystal ball. They were indeed almost to Emerald City. Away from where Rouge could attack Cream and get the boots.

"I'll have to slow them down somehow … OH!" thought Rouge, who had a sudden burst of inspiration. "Fuzzys …" she said to herself.

"What?" asked Shadow.

"Fuzzys will slow them down … and probably make them kill each other …" said Rouge.

"Oh, I hate Fuzzys! They always make me stumble around and they make the ground move too!" complained the dark blue stripped hedgehog from chapter 5, who was sitting on the window sill.

"Riku! Get out of here!" Shadow barked at his subordinate/clone. Riku was startled and fell backwards out of the window. When Shadow had turned his attention back to Rouge, she was waving her hands around the crystal ball, chanting a word over and over again.

"Fuzzys … fuzzys … fuzzys will make them sleep …" Rouge said to the crystal ball.

"They make you drunk, not sleepy." said a voice. Shadow looked at the window and saw Riku there again.

"Will you get out of here!" shouted Shadow abruptly. Riku was taken off guard again and fell backwards out of the room again.

XXX

The quintet (oh my god! That's a real word!) were skipping along the yellow bricked road once again, when they noticed a light up a head. "That's the exit!" said Cream excitedly. Everyone else broke into a run and ran to the light, eager to get out of this green hell-hole. Suddenly, they all burst out into a clearing of brilliant, sparkling grass and saw tall, emerald towers reaching towards the sky in the distance.

"That's Emerald City!" shouted Fox as he pointed towards the towers. They all began to run towards the towers when they noticed that small white fluffs were descending from the sky.

"Is it snowing?" asked Cream, looking up towards the sky. As the fluffs came closer and closer to the ground, it was revealed that they weren't so small. In fact, they were twice the size of Cream! Everyone also noticed that they had beady little eyes as well.

"Is it just me, or is the snow coming after us?" asked Scarecrow. The fluffs were indeed floating after them from every direction, not just the sky. One of them got extremely close, so Cheese reached out and touched it. A siren sound went off as the fluff exploded on contact into small little specks that Cheese inhaled.

"Chaoooo (Whoooaa) …" moaned Cheese. He fell out of Cream's arms and began stumbling around. To Cheese, the ground was moving up and down likes waves on the ocean, and Cheese couldn't control his body anymore. He felt completely stoned out of his mind, dude.

"Is Cheese ok- whooooaaa …" asked Fox, who was nudged by a fluff who came up from behind him. Fox began to stumble around as well. "Are we on the ocean?" he asked slowly.

"What are you talking about?" asked Scarecrow. A fluff came up from behind him and bumped into him, also exploding, but Scarecrow only noticed the siren sound from the explosion.

"The fluffy thing didn't affect - yoooouuuu …" said Cream as she was also struck with a fluff. Scarecrow observed that Cream, Cheese, and Fox were stumbling around, hitting other fluffs, and Tin Man had a mental breakdown and is now crying his eyes out again.

"Get a hold of yourself, Tin Man, or you'll rust again!" shouted Scarecrow. "We need to help them!"

"We're all doomed!" screamed Tin Man in agony. He then curled up on the ground into the fetal position. "Help, help!" he began to shout.

"That's not going to help out here!" yelled Scarecrow. He then turned around and began shouting, "Help, HELP!" All of a sudden, the image of Amy appeared on the field.

"Don't worry, I'll help." she said sweetly to Scarecrow, and she flicked her wand and disappeared as quickly as she came.

'Weird …' thought Scarecrow. He then heard a rumbling noise off in the distance. He looked over to the west and thought that he was looking at a … rainbow … coming at them. Scarecrow ran over to Tin Man. "Tin Man! There's a funny lookin' rainbow coming after us too!" Scarecrow told Tin Man.

"We're all doomed! First Fuzzys, now killer Rainbows!" Tin Man sobbed. Scarecrow looked back at the rainbow and noticed that there were individual pieces to the rainbow. They looked like little dinosaurs.

"I think it's a herd of dinosaurs …" Scarecrow said to himself. He then heard a unified cry come from the rainbow dinosaurs. "… Yoshi?" said Scarecrow. The dinosaurs were upon then now, throwing spotted eggs left and right, destroying the Fuzzys. Then there was only one Fuzzy left, who exploded under pressure. The dinosaurs rejoiced and stampeded there way in the opposite direction that they came in. Scarecrow looked around and noticed that everyone was lying on the ground. Cream got up first and scratched her head.

"What happened?" asked Cream groggily. Cheese and Fox got up too and moaned. Scarecrow looked over to Tin Man, who was still curled up on the ground.

"You can get up now, Tin Man, we're not dead." Scarecrow hollered at Tin Man, who didn't respond. "… Tin Man"? Silence again. Scarecrow walked over to Tin Man and noticed that he was frozen stiff. "Must have been all that crying …" he muttered to himself. Grunting was heard from Tin Man. Scarecrow laughed a little and went over to help up Cream.

XXX

"Grrr! Damn that Amy! I'll have to go to Emerald City myself, now!" Rouge yelled angrily at the crystal ball. She then fetched her broom and got up on the window sill again.

"What good will that do?" asked Shadow, who hadn't moved from his spot next to the crystal ball.

"You'll see." she told him simply. Rouge then kept looking behind her to see if Shadow was going to attempt another "free shot". She finally decided that it was safe to go and jumped off the window sill and flew off towards Emerald City. She didn't notice that her panties were now around her ankles as she flew, courtesy of Shadow. He watched her go with a smirk on his face.

XXX

After the group recuperated after the Fuzzy incident, they all looked up at Emerald City and began to skip towards it on the road, happy that they had finally reached The Eggman. Little did they know that there journey was far from over.

…

**They've finally reached Emerald City! Took them long enough -- **

**I love Yoshi! He's my favorite video game character (sorry, Shadow), so I had to include a yoshi reference somewhere. If you've ever played Yoshi's Island, you would know where I got the chapter title from. Ah, Yoshi's Island ... I should go replay that ... I still haven't unlocked those secret levels (at least I beat the game, unlike my brother ...)**

**See you next chappie 3**


	8. I am the Eggman

**Happy Skippy Jumpy Yay! Another chapter checked off the to do list! Well, I'll stop talking (well, typing, but whatever) and let you get to it.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I no own nothin' here, biznotch. This time ...**

Chapter **8 !!!11!!!!1!!!1!11!!!! **_I Am The Eggman_

The gang skipped merrily up to the tall, elaborately embroidered emerald doors of Emerald City. They appeared to have a round face with a very spiky mustache jutting out from the sides on the door. They stopped before the doors, which were about two stories high, and Cream grabbed the tassel hanging from the door and gave it a tug. A chime was heard and the group began mumbling amongst themselves before a panel in the door flung open. "Who rang that bell?!" shouted a very annoyed purple chameleon garbed in emerald robes.

"Sorry sir, but I rang the bell." said a startled Cream.

"Can't you inbred hicks read?" asked the chameleon.

"Huh?" wondered Cream. She had no idea who he could be talking to.

"There's a sign right there!" said the chameleon, pointing right underneath where he was hanging out the window. There was an awkward pause. The chameleon then looked down and noticed that there was a poster of a naked women sprawled provocatively on a pool table on the door, and he blushed instantly. "Uh-er-ah …" he sputtered, and then he tore the poster from the wall and disappeared back inside the doors. He came back out and hung a sign on the door, went back inside and closed the panel.

"Bell out of order. Please knock." Everyone read aloud. Everyone but Cheese, who was too busy thinking of ways to get those Fuzzys to come back. That was the most freedom he had felt since … well, he was never really free to begin with, he pondered. Scarecrow then grabbed Tin Man's arms and proceeded to slamming it onto the panel. When the chameleon opened the panel again, he was smacked on the head with Tin Man's arm, knocking him out cold.

"Nice going, genius! You killed the door guy!" accused Tin Man of Scarecrow.

"I'm a genius?" asked Scarecrow. Tin Man growled and smacked Scarecrow upside the head with his axe, decapitating him.

"Tin Man! What are you doing?!" shouted a worried Fox.

"Knocking some sense into that stuffed pillow!" answered Tin Man.

"You didn't have to chop his head off!" argued Fox.

"I wasn't trying to, you pussy!" retorted Tin Man.

"I am not a female reproductive organ!" shouted Fox angrily.

"Um, not to interrupt the tender moment, but could someone go get my head?" asked Scarecrow. Tin Man huffed and crossed him arms and Fox did the same while Cream fetched Scarecrow's head and sewed it back into place.

"HI!!" said an annoying high pitched voice from the door. Everyone looked over to the open panel and noticed that the chameleon was replaced with a little bee, who couldn't have been more than six years old.

"Hi!" Scarecrow said as he waved to the bee.

"Who is he?" whispered Cream to Scarecrow.

"Not a clue!" Scarecrow cheerfully replied.

"Uh, mister bee, could you please let us in?" asked Cream of the buzzing bee in the panel.

"Sure!" he replied. The bee disappeared and closed the panel. Then a great rumbling was heard as the doors slowly opened to reveal a bustling city, alive with people wandering around and a woman sitting on a mat in the middle of the room, smacking her hands against the ground and asking people to give her things. Also, everything was emerald. Walls, tapestries, rugs, toilets, clothes, handbags, food, soilent green … everything but skin and fur color. The gang walked in slowly and stopped when a rick shaw pulled by a fat purple cat came up in front of them. Seated in the rick shaw was a little frog with a fu man chu, wearing a emerald overcoat with gold trimmings. And not an anthro frog, mind you, but an actual frog.

"Wourd you rike a toul?" said the frog.

"No hablo espanol." replied Scarecrow.

"No, Scarecrow. That's not Spanish. He said 'would you like a tour?'." corrected Fox.

"I don't care what he said. I'm not taking a ride on that!" said Tin Man, " Lets just go to where the Eggman is already! It's been long enough already!"

"Wlong, Mistel echidna. Toul filst, then Eggman." spoke the frog.

"Shut up! I can't understand a word you're saying!" shouted Tin Man.

"Lets just go take the tour, Tin Man. Then we can see the Eggman!" announced Scarecrow.

"Fine. Lets just get it over with." sighed Tin Man. Everyone piled into the rick shaw and sat down before the purple cat began to walk again.

"I think these seats are wet …" complained Fox.

"Or you're wet." mumbled Tin Man under his breath. The rick shaw continued at an even pace throughout the square, until it stopped at the beauty parlor, and everyone began singing. Scarecrow found the tune quite catchy, and began to sing along. Tin Man then knocked his head off again and it rolled into the parlor. Everyone got out of the rick shaw and looked around.

"Hey, where did that frog go?" asked Fox.

"Fwoggy?" said the big purple cat as it turned around to check the rick shaw. The rest of the group realized what had happened and grabbed Fox and ran into the beauty parlor before the cat found out that Fox had sat on his friend. Once inside, different attendants separated the group and took them off to different sections of the parlor to get cleaned up. The author was waaaaay to lazy to go into detail, so she sped up time and had them come out of the beauty parlor, all sparkly clean. Everyone was singing (except Cheese, for reasons known) and preparing to start a giant dance routine, when an exploding sound was heard from the sky. Everyone looked up and Cream gasped.

"The wicked witch!" everyone screeched. Sure enough, the wicked witch was flying around in the sky, leaving a trail of black smoke in her wake.

XXX

It was the perfect plan, Rouge thought. The rabbit would be so terrified of the message and everyone would immediately turn her in when they figured out that Rouge wanted her. The perfect plan. Rouge cackled as she began spelling out her message in the sky. Suddenly, a bird flew right into Rouge's face, and she began screaming and spinning uncontrollably in the air.

XXX

Everyone looked up in awe at the sight of the wicked witch spinning around in the sky.

"Surrender … Cre … f---ing … s--t … god … damnit … mother … f--- … hell …" Scarecrow read aloud as he was reading the message the wicked witch had written in the sky. She then flew away, and a small white object began fluttering down towards the crowd. Said object landed on top of Tin Man's head, who took it off and inspected it.

"Yeeeeee Haaaaaaaaw!" Tin Man shouted as he thrusted the panties in the air, "Score 1 for Tin Man! I knew she loved me!" Everyone looked at him like he was insane.

"Oh, no! The wicked witch knows I'm here. We have to go see the Eggman!" said Cream. The crowd then led her to another set of doors that had the same symbol on them as the front doors outside.

"No can do little bunny," said a voice from behind her. She turned around and saw the purple chameleon from earlier with a bump in the middle of his forehead. "No one sees the Eggman. Now get lost! All of you! Skedaddle!" The chameleon said as he shooed away the crowd. The gathering quickly dissipated until only the quintet (I had to use it again, squee!) was left. Cream began to cry.

"Now I won't get to go home, or get these stupid shoes off!" she sobbed. Everyone then hugged Cream and comforted her, except …

"Chao chao! Chao chao chao chao (Oh Boo HOO! Do you ever stop whining)?!" said Cheese snobbishly.

"It's okay Cheese. At least we have friends here," Cream replied, and then she began crying again. Cheese huffed and began to pout.

"… Oh okay! I'll see what I can do." said the chameleon. He then opened a panel in the door and walked through and closed the panel behind him.

"… Now what do we do?" asked Scarecrow.

"I could sing a song about how I'll be king of the forest once I get courage." offered Fox.

"No, please don't"

"When I

Am king

Of the foreeeeeest!" began Fox, but then Tin Man flew at him and clamped his hand over Fox's mouth.

"What the hell was that noise?!" shouted Tin Man.

"That was just me singing …" defended Fox.

"Then NEVER sing again!" shouted Tin Man. Fox slumped over and sat down next to Scarecrow as they all waited for the chameleon to come back.

XXX

Rouge was almost back to her castle after her little fiasco with the bird, which she roasted and thought it would make a nice dinner. She was in a very sullen and grumpy mood as she landed on the window sill and stepped down and hung her broom up. "So how'd it go?" asked Shadow, who was lying on Rouge's couch when she arrived. Rouge gave him a 'if you say one wrong thing, you won't be able to have babies' look. She moved over to the crystal ball and sat in front of it, gazing at it intently. Rouge noticed that something was wrong when she sat down, and checked under her robe and noticed that her panties were gone.

"What the hell?!" Rouge shouted. She then heard some snickering from the couch. Rouge then got up and began walking somewhere. 'I'm dead meat now,' thought Shadow, 'At least it was worth the look on her face.' Five minutes had passed. Then ten. Then twenty. Then another ten. And finally a pig flew by the window and snorted. Shadow had expected himself to be torn apart by now and his innards thrown from the tower and burned, but nothing had happened. Shadow got curious and sat up and looked around, taking notice that Rouge was gone.

"Rouge?" Shadow called, and got some sniffles from the bedroom in reply. He got up and walked through the curtain to her bedroom, which had many fine jeweled objects and spell books lying around the place, but his attention was on Rouge, laying facedown on her bed and hugging a purple pillow, which she was crying into. Shadow felt his heart tighten a bit. 'Wait,' he thought, 'I have feelings?' he was pulled out of his thoughts by Rouge, who was sitting up and looking at him. Her eyes were all puffy and red, and the pillow was stained a dark purple. Shadow's heart tightened more. He knew that it was not going to be easy to start 'feeling'.

Shadow walked over to Rouge quietly and sat down on the bed next to her. Rouge then unexpectedly flung herself onto Shadow and gripped him. 'So NOW she's going to kill me.' Shadow thought, but he found out that instead of ripping out his organs, she was hugging him. Hugging. Shadow did not usually handle hugging to well, but he decided to make an exception. He hugged her back and then an idea came to his head.

"Would you like to relieve some of that tension?" asked Shadow. Rouge nodded. Shadow then put his hand under her chin and kissed her. Rouge was taken aback slightly, but then began to kiss back. Shadow then rolled Rouge onto her back and began to kiss her passionately, and Rouge loved it. She realized that they loved each other, even if Shadow couldn't really 'feel', but that's okay. Then Shadow began to slowly remove Rouge's robe …

XXX

"Shouldn't we hide the body?" asked Scarecrow.

"I don't think anyone would really care. I certainly don't." replied Tin Man.

"But you don't have a heart, so how can you care?" Scarecrow pointed out. "More importantly, how can you love the wicked witch if you don't have a heart?" The author cleared their memories again, so as to hide the plot hole. Oh! I suppose you want to know who they're talking about, huh? Well, we can't always get what we want, now can we? … Oh fine. The chameleon came back and said that they couldn't see the Eggman, so Tin Man threw his axe at him. There, are you happy?

"Chao chao chao chao chao (I wish I could make him give me his axe so I could kill Cream with it)." mumbled Cheese.

"I know, Cheese. Tin Man is so mean to people!" Cream said disgustedly as she looked over at Tin Man. The group then chucked the chameleon's body behind some random plot device bushes and walked down the dark hallway towards the Eggman's lair. They eventually reached a giant circular room with what looked like a pipe organ sitting on the opposite side of the room. The pipes were spewing multi colored smoke and the air had the odd aroma of apricots. Fox was shaking like crazy and tried to turn back several times, but was stopped by Tin Man.

"Why are you here!" a voice bellowed out. The group stopped in their tracks and began to quake. Then the image of a head of a bald man with small circular glasses and a ridiculously long and spread out mustache appeared out of the smoke of the pipes of the pipe organ.

"Wh- who are y- y- you?" questioned Cream.

"I am the Eggman!" the head announced. Then a rendition of 'E.G.G.M.A.N.' (Eggman's theme from Sonic adventure 2) began playing and the head started singing along to the lyrics.

"Uhh …" began Scarecrow.

"Do not interrupt my singing!" bellowed the head.

"But we need your help!" pleaded Cream. The music stopped.

"What would I possibly do for you?" inquired the Eggman.

Cream took a deep breath to steady herself. "Well … I need to get these shoes off … and I want to go home … and-"

"Silence! I already know what you desire. You must do something for me first before I can help you, though." bellowed the head.

"What is it?" asked Cream.

"I was going to say it! Don't rush me!" shouted the Eggman as neon flames erupted from behind him. "Now then, bring me the bra of the wicked witch of the west." said the Eggman.

"… Huh?" asked Cream.

"I will not repeat myself! Now GO! And don't come back without it!" bellowed the Eggman. "The Eggman has spoken!" the head then disappeared. Fox then escaped Tin Man's grip and took off down the hall to the nearest window, and jumped through it.

"At least he held of this long." said Scarecrow. The group then fetched Fox from outside the window, and left Emerald City, traveling west towards the wicked witch's castle. Only problem was that Fox was bleeding everywhere, so they quickly turned to the east to find the nearest hospital.

…

**There, now wasn't that great? They're finally on their way to get the witch's ... bra ...**

** I know, the Shadouge part was a bit too fluffy for the tone of the story, but I like it. There are probably going to be at least 2 more chapters after this one, 3 if I decide to do an epilouge. Hopefully, those chapters will come sooner rather than later, and then I can start on my oneshot Bowser stories and various other projects that come to mind :) So long, y'all!**


	9. I Have You Now

**Sorry for taking so long to update. Again, the only excuse I really have is laziness and not being on the computer too much in the past couple weeks :P I also had to split this chapter into two parts because it became ridiculously long. I might repost this chapter if I decide to split the chapter differently, though.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: See previous chapters. I do own Kai and Riku, though, so HA!**

Chapter **9!!!1!!!!11!!!!!!11!!**_ I Have You Now_

Rouge and Shadow were cuddling under the sheets of Rouge's bed after a nice long session of 'relieving tension'. The soft glow of the candles around them made the atmosphere quite lovely. "Oh, I love you, Shadow." Rouge sighed as she cuddled up to him more.

"You're okay, Rouge." said Shadow. Rouge gave him a slightly annoyed look, but then proceeded to resting her head on his fluffy chest fur.

"Captain! We just found out the rab-" began the yellow-striped clone from chapter 5 as he walked into the bedroom. The clone gaped at the two new lovers while they were cuddling. They stared right back at him as the blood drained from their faces.

"Kai! Get the hell out of here!" bellowed Shadow.

"B- but the Rabbit and her friends are coming here!" replied Kai.

"What?!" said a shocked Rouge. She instantly leapt from the bed and stormed past Kai, all while stark naked. Kai froze in place and didn't utter another word. Shadow sighed and got out of the bed too, proceeding to put his gloves back on and preen his wings. He left the room and walked over to Rouge, who was staring intently at the image of the idiots wandering towards her castle. "The Eggman must have told them to come." she muttered.

"What are your orders, Rouge?" asked Shadow.

"Gather up the clones and go capture Cream and her chao. You can do as you wish with the others, but bring the rabbit and the chao alive. I have plans for them …" said Rouge darkly, and she began laughing quietly to herself.

"You're going to rape her!?" an astonished voice said from the doorway. It was none other than Riku. They all just stared at him. Kai found his voice again.

"Ew, Riku. Just … ew …" said Kai.

"Both of you! Go get the others and tell them to head towards the forest to capture the rabbit and her chao. They can do what they want with the others." ordered Shadow.

"Yes sir!" saluted Riku, who then turned around and tripped down the stairs. Kai's legs began to work again and he silently walked out of the room, still in shock. Shadow then leapt up onto the window sill and prepared for flight.

"Wait! Shadow." Rouge called and Shadow stood still on the sill.

"What is it, Rouge?" Shadow asked before he felt Rouge's broomstick smack him on the butt. Shadow yelped and turned to look at a smirking Rouge.

"That was for before." Rouge said, still smirking.

"Can you smack me a little harder?" asked Shadow, sticking his butt out slightly. Rouge then became sour and then jumped up behind him and shoved him out the window.

"Fly, my pretties! Fly!" Rouge shouted with glee to her troops. The rest of the clones took flight and went off to do the witch's bidding, and start a bonfire with that annoying Scarecrow. Then Rouge realized that she was still naked, and ran to the bedroom to put her clothes back on.

XXX

The fellowship (I was running out of different names for 'group') had finally treated Fox's cuts and began to travel on their not so merry way to the wicked witch's castle. To get there, they had to travel threw a dark, gloomy forest filled with dead trees and other dead things. I'm just not trying anymore, am I? "Uh, I think the giant gash in my arm is still bleeding. Can we go back?" asked Fox nervously.

"You're just trying to weasel out of going to get the witch's bra, so NO!" answered Tin Man. Fox moaned a bit as he looked at the growing red blotch on his bandaged arm. The others were oblivious to his pain, for they were trying to figure out where the heck the witch's castle was in the first place.

"Why did we think that going through this scary forest would lead us to the witch's castle?" asked Fox.

"Because you always have to go through a scary place to reach your destination!" replied Scarecrow in his usual upbeat manner. Fox wasn't reassured by Scarecrow's explanation, but who's ever reassured by a bag of straw that shouldn't be walking around in the first place? As they slowly tiptoed through the forest, Cream thought she saw something ahead in the sky.

"Do you guys see that?" asked Cream. The group came to a stop and craned their heads to the sky and noticed a massive black blob coming towards them.

"Do you think it's the Fuzzys again?" asked Scarecrow.

"Weren't they white?" asked Fox.

"I can't see anything!" complained Tin Man. Everyone looked at Tin Man briefly, and a small gust of wind rushed by them.

"Hm … That was weird. What do you think that was?" asked Scarecrow as he turned to look at Cream, only Cream was no longer there. Instead, an equally confused Cheese was standing on the ground where Cream used to be. "… Cream?"

"Chao chao chao chao, chao (Do I even look like Cream, you idiot)?!" complained a now annoyed Cheese.

"Help Me!" came a cry from the sky. The gang looked up and saw Cream in the clutches of someone who looked a lot like …

"Shadow!" Tin Man shouted angrily. Shadow paused mid-flight and turned to look at Tin Man.

"I'd like to stay and chat, Tin Man, but I have business to attend to," Shadow turned towards two others who looked a lot like him as they approached. "Riku, Kai, get the chao," he ordered.

"Yes, Captain!" they both saluted, and Riku began fluttering around, screaming, because said chao was now clawing away at his face. "Good job, clones. Now get it back to the castle!" Shadow ordered, not noticing Riku's suffering. He then disappeared in a flash of green light before anything else was said.

"That bastard …" Tin Man mumbled to himself. The gang watched as Kai was trying to pry Cheese off of Riku's face, without much success, I might add. They turned around eventually, and noticed that the whole clone army was here, right before they scooped up Scarecrow and began tearing him apart, cackling madly.

"Scarecrow!" Fox called, but he was whisked away too, and flung into a tree. Tin Man held his ground and kept wildly swinging his axe at the clones. It wasn't enough to keep them from descending upon him …

XXX

Cream sobbed next to Shadow as they waited outside a door inside the wicked witch's castle. "Stop your sobbing. You don't want to appear weak, do you?" Shadow told Cream sternly and coldly. Cream continued sobbing though, as if she didn't even hear him. Cream just wanted to go home and get these stupid ruby boots off. Why did these people want to hurt her?

"Please, mister Shadow. I just want to go home!" she cried. She looked up at his indifferent and fiery eyes, and got no response, or sympathy, from the black, winged hedgehog.

"Then you know what you must do, then." Shadow finally answered. Cream's crying softened to whimpers as she knew that the witch just wanted the boots. If she got the boot's then Cream could go home.

"B- but I don't know how!" she cried, and her sobbing commenced. Shadow rolled his eyes. Finally, the door inched open, and The Wicked Witch stood in the entry, garbed in a lace bra that only covered her nipples, and matching underwear with a zipper on the crotch and a whip fastened to the side. The blood drained from Rouge's face as quickly as it rushed to Shadow's. Cream stopped her crying and looked very confused at the witch's costume. The door slammed in Cream's face and everything was dead silent. "Mister Shadow, what was that strange clothing that the witch was wearing?" asked Cream.

"You'll learn when you're older," Shadow responded calmly, even though his face was as red as a ripe tomato. About a minute passed before the door opened again, and the witch was now dressed in her regular black robe and pointy hat.

"About time you came, my dear," Rouge said nastily to Cream. Cream flinched as new tears began to pool around her eyes. Shadow led Cream into the witch's tower, his face now back to it's normal color, and he set her down on a chair next to a sparkling crystal ball. "Now then …" Rouge began, as she crouched down to Cream's feet. Rouge reached out to the boots, and yelped as an electrical current ran through her whole body. She jumped away from the boots which then sparkled in the setting sun's rays. "Grr!" the witch growled.

"Amy must have put a spell on them so you couldn't get them," Shadow suggested to Rouge.

"Of course! It's something she'd definitely do!" Rouge then turned to Cream, "And you better figure out how to get those boots off, or I'll have to cut your feet off." Rouge threatened. Cream began sobbing again.

"I don't know how!" Cream cried again, and a tapping noise came from the window. Shadow walked over and opened it. Kai came in with a mauled and bloodied Riku and a fussing chao. Cheese was kicking and screaming in Riku's grasp, and also tried to chew Riku's hands off.

"Here's the chao, Captain!" Kai reported, and Riku moaned while slightly nodding his head.

"Excellent work, clones. Now put it in the basket." Shadow said, and Kai brought the basket to Riku and Riku put the chao in the basket and fastened the lid shut. Cheese took one of Riku's fingers with him, though.

"I better get worker's comp …" muttered Riku as he observed his mutilated hand. Kai saluted and Riku lifted his hand to his chest because he was so sore and they both left the room.

"Well, you better think of something fast, or both you and your chao shall pay the price!" stated Rouge.

"No! Leave Cheese out of this!" Cream pleaded. Rouge ignore her and walked over to a ornate hourglass filled with crimson sand. She then turned over the hourglass and faced Cream. "This is how much time you have left to live, so you better think fast!" Rouge said, and she turned to the door and walked out. Shadow followed and closed the door behind him. Cream returned to her sobbing and anguish. All was lost. What could she possibly do now? The crystal ball began to glow faintly, and the image of Cream's mom appeared in the crystal ball.

"Cream? Cream, where are you? I made a pie!" Vanilla's voice called from the crystal ball.

"Oh, Mommy! I miss you so much! I miss mister Sonic, and Mister Knuckles, and Tails, and the farm! Oh, I want to be there Mommy! Mommy!" Cream cried. Then her mother's face morphed into the wicked witch's unexpectedly.

"Mommy, mommy, mommy! I'm so whiny, mommy, and I am just a stupid little rabbit who's worthless! Mommy!" The wicked witch mocked. She then cackled evilly, and the crystal ball turned black. Cream began to cry again, as she awaited her fate.

…

**Will Cream escape before the wicked witch kills her? If she does, will she make it back home? Why am I you these questions if I already know the answers? I don't know :P**

**Again, I'll repost this chapter if I decide to cut this chapter differently, so I will see you later. Toodles :)**


	10. Annialation, Thy Name is H2O

**Tadaa! Another chapter! This story is finally drawing to a close. I never thought I'd get this far, honestly. I mean, ten chapters and tens of thousands of words, and there's still another chapter to go! I am very thankful to those of you who have actually read tis whole story. You keep me going :) **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own Kai and Riku. Everything else is copyright of it's respective owners :P ... blah blah blah ...**

Chapter **10 !!!!!!11!!1!!!!!!!**_ Annialation, Thy Name is H2O_

Tin Man awoke from his unconscious state and found himself covered in vomit and some sticky white goo that he didn't even want to think about, and his axe embedded in his chest. "College all over again …" he sighed to himself. Tin Man wrestled his axe out of his chest and got up to go find out what happened to the others. As he walked, he noticed little bits of hay strewn about the path, and decided to follow it, about fifty feet away, he found the crumpled body of Scarecrow lying in the middle of the path.

"Oh, it's just like college all over again!" Scarecrow whined.

"You went to college?" asked Tin Man.

"Yeah! I was a cadaver!" Scarecrow explained. Tin Man's face went cross as he tried to figure out how this guy was a cadaver if he'd never been alive before. Tin Man shook his head and ran over to help him anyway.

"Do you have any idea where the rest of you is?" asked Tin Man.

"They threw my arms over in the trees and my legs over there and my stuffing all over the path!" Scarecrow whined.

"Okay, quit your bitchin' and I'll get your stuffing!" interrupted Tin Man. Scarecrow looked quizzically at Tin Man and raised his hand in protest, but then sunk back into his depression when he remembered that is was in the trees somewhere. Tin Man stumbled around the path picking up scraps of Scarecrow as he went, when he heard a low moan come from above. He looked up and saw Fox tangled in the braches above his head. The branch snapped and Fox fell on top of Tin Man.

"Ouch …" moaned Fox. When both of them looked at each other, they noticed that they were in a rather provocative position, and they quickly jumped away from each other and dusted themselves off before the author could get any ideas for yaoi stories.

"We will never speak of this moment again!" declared Tin Man.

"Agreed," responded Fox. Fox then helped Tin Man pick up the rest of Scarecrow and put him back together so we can move on with the story. The author decided to hit the fast forward button so that they'd be a the witch's castle.

"Oh, what a world, what a world!" screamed Rouge as she began to sink into the flo- Oops, too far. Rewind.

The trio peered over the rocks at the witch's castle. It was guarded by many clones who were prancing around the front door, playing hopscotch.

"Hey! You can't go over the line when you throw the rock! That's against the rules!" shouted one of the clones.

"Not in my world, is isn't," replied the clone who threw the rock.

Lightning struck and lit the castle, making it look like it had the face of a terrible monster. A clone then came with a fire extinguisher and put out the flames the lightning had caused, and then returned to his post.

"How are we going to get in there?" asked Fox.

"I know how. I used to sneak in there all the time!" boasted Tin Man, "But then Shadow installed an electric fence to keep Rouge and I apart, and he put this weird ankle bracelet on me." said Tin Man, holding out his leg and revealing a metal ring wrapped around his ankle with a flashing red light on it.

"And that shocks you." said Scarecrow, pointing out the obvious.

"Of course not! Tin doesn't conduct electricity, so I don't know how it shocks me." corrected Tin Man. Fox gave Tin Man a ridiculous look.

"Then what does conduct electricity?" asked Fox sarcastically.

"Trees, duh! They always get struck during a lightning storm!" answered Tin Man matter-of-factly.

"And peas in a can," Scarecrow said. The other two simply stared at him. "See? There are peas in a can right there!" explained Scarecrow as he gestured to the can of peas right next to him.

"I have a plan," announced Tin Man, and he hastily grabbed the can of peas and chucked it at one of the guards by the front door. It hit it's target.

"Ow!" said the clone that was hit in the head with the flying canned goods.

"What happened?" asked the clone standing next to him.

"I got hit in the head with a can of peas!" shouted the clone as he picked up the green can with a depiction of a bowl of peas on the front.

"Can of pee?" said another clone as he walked over, "Don't those explode?" All the clones heard that and stopped what they were doing. They all began screaming and running around in circles. The castle door opened slowly and the clones quickly ran inside, the first clone dropping the can of peas in the confusion. The can of peas rolled on the ground innocently for a few feet and then promptly exploded.

"Wow! They really do explode!" said an excited Scarecrow. They all began walking towards the castle when Tin Man began shaking uncontrollably and then ran back to the cliffs. Scarecrow then ran up to Tin Man, grabbed his axe, and chopped the metal band off Tin Man's ankle, and also his foot.

"What are you doing to me?!" screamed an irritated Tin Man.

"Getting the shocky thing off," Scarecrow replied calmly as he looked up at Tin Man. Scarecrow then pulled out a blow torch and melded Tin Man's foot back on, but it was on backwards.

"You moron!" said Tin Man. They both turned to look at Fox, who was trying to sneak past the both of them.

"Uhh …" was all Fox got out before Tin Man pounced on him and began hobbling towards the front door, which the clones left open. Scarecrow followed behind them, trying to remember why they came here in the first place.

XXX

Cream was huddled in the corner, crying to no end while she awaited her doom. Yep, nothing's really changed for Cream, but on the table across the room from her, a picnic basket was rocking back and forth while the irritated chao inside tried to escape. He eventually found the latch and pried the basket open with a crowbar he found inside. The lid popped open and Cheese poked his teardrop shaped head through the opening.

"Chao, chao (Ugh, finally)!" groaned Cheese as he heaved himself out of the basket. He stood on top of the table and peered at his surroundings, finally setting his sites on Cream huddled in the corner. "Chao chao (Now's my chance)," whispered Cheese to himself as he stifled a maniacal laugh. He observed the room more closely and noticed a special rifle on the wall. It was all black with red streaks running down the sides of the gun, gleaming in the faint light from the crystal ball. It was the Shadow Rifle. Cheese fluttered up to it and took it off the rungs that held it on the wall, completely ignoring the "KEEP YOUR DIRTY PAWS OFF" sign hanging right under it. Cheese quickly took aim and was about to pull the trigger when his target pounced onto him.

"Cheese!" Cream squealed in delight as she crushed the tiny chao in a bear hug, turning him purple.

"Chao (God damnit)!" squeaked Cheese. Cream stopped hugging Cheese for a moment and looked down at him.

"We have to get out of here really quickly, but how?" Cream asked Cheese. A loud bang came from the door, and startled Cream. Another one came and Cream noticed an axe come through the door as well. One final smash and the door fell off it's hinges and onto the floor. Tin Man then stepped through the door followed by Scarecrow who was holding Fox by his feet. "Tin Man! Scarecrow! Fox!" Cream cheered as she ran over to greet her saviors.

"Hi!" greeted Scarecrow as he waved at Cream.

"How did you guys find me?" asked Cream.

"We hiked along the forest and threw peas in a can at- ow!" said Scarecrow as he was smacked on the head by Tin Man,

"That's not important right now. We need to go find the wicked witch and get her bra!" said Tin Man hastily.

"What about my bra?" came a voice from behind them. They all turned to see the wicked witch in the doorway with Shadow right next to her and the clone army behind them.

"Uh …" was all the dumbfounded Tin Man could get out of his mouth.

"I believe your time is up, little rabbit," announced Rouge as she walked over to the hourglass. She did a double take as she noticed that the sand in the hour glass hadn't moved at all from when she turned it over. She then smacked it and knocked it off the table, making it shatter on the floor and spilling the ruby sand across the floor. "Damnit!" Rouge said under her breath. "Anyway, your time IS up, so I'll have to kill you now,"

"Chao chao chao! Chao (Over my dead body! She's mine)!" squeaked Cheese as he flew towards Rouge, but found himself being strangled by Shadow, making him drop the Shadow rifle.

"RUN!!" shouted Fox as he broke loose from Scarecrow's grip and bowled over the clones on his way to the stairs. Shadow dropped Cheese and the rest of the fellowship followed Fox out of the door. The clones groaned and got up from the floor.

"What are you all waiting for? After them!" shouted Rouge as she pointed to the entryway. The clones tried to go through the door at the same time, but got stuck. Rouge slapped her forehead in frustration as Shadow walked over and kicked them all through the entryway, sending them tumbling down the stairs. Shadow looked back at Rouge before walking down the stairs after his idiot clones, and Rouge closely followed, broomstick in hand.

XXX

The gang was running after Fox so they could turn around and go get the witch's bra, but weren't gaining any ground on him. "Fox! Get back here or we'll leave you out of the deal when we get the bra!" shouted Tin Man, who was clomping along a little ways behind because of his gimpy foot.

"I don't care anymore! I just want to get out of here!" replied Fox as he sped up. They chased Fox to a tower in the far off parts of the castle and noticed that he had stopped dead in his tracks at the sentry tower.

"He finally stopped!" cheered Scarecrow. Scarecrow burst into his supersonic speed run and stopped right next to Fox.

"What the hell?" wondered Tin Man as the other three caught up to Scarecrow and Fox, and they stopped suddenly as well. Shadow was standing in front of them, blocking the way, the grouped turned around and noticed that there was another group of clones coming from the direction they came from, being led by the wicked witch herself. The party came to a stop at the sentry tower and Rouge was catching her breath.

"Ha! No one escapes the wicked witch!" said Rouge as she rose to her full height. The group cowered at her sight, and Tin Man crawled forward on his hands and knees.

"My beloved!" he cried as he began bowing to her. Rouge rolled her eyes.

"And how the hell did you get in here? I thought I put up an electric fence to keep you out," Rouge then glanced at his foot, noticing that it was upside down. Tin Man caught her glancing away.

"Checking out my ass, eh?" Tin Man said, trying to sound seductive.

"Oh, please!" said Rouge as she held her broomstick to the torch above her head, lighting the end of it. "Now," she began, eyeing Scarecrow.

"You love him?!" shouted Tin Man, noticing that Rouge looked at Scarecrow. Tin Man then snatched the broomstick from Rouge and tossed it at Scarecrow. Scarecrow's arm caught fire and he began screaming and running around the sentry tower, flailing his arms about.

"Don't worry, Scarecrow! I'll save you!" shouted Cream as she picked up the bucket of water and threw it a Scarecrow, the bucket hit Scarecrow in the head and splashed all over him and Rouge. Rouge cried out in agony and staggered to the center of the sentry tower.

"Oh, what a world, what a world!" screamed Rouge as she began to sink into the floor, steam pouring out of her clothing. "Who would have thought that a little rabbit like you could destroy my lovely wickedness! Oh, what a world!" she continued as she sank deeper and deeper, seemingly melting away into nothingness. Tin Man dived at the pile of fabric that use to be Rouge and found the bra. He spun around and it hung suspended in the air over his hand as a jingle played. A text box appeared in front of Tin Man, saying:

You got The Wicked Witch's Bra

A lacy black bra worn by the wicked witch. Ew, it's a little sweaty …

The text box disappeared and Tin Man resumed standing normally with the bra in his hand.

"You … killed her …" said Riku slowly.

"It was an accident, honest!" pleaded Cream. The clones began jumping up and down, shouting. Cream had a flash back to when she met the Black Arms and thought that they were going to attack, and she curled up into the fetal position.

"She's dead! Hooray!" the clones cheered. "All hail Cream! All hail Cream!" they began chanting while pumping their fists and hugging each other.

"You're … happy?" asked Scarecrow of the clones.

"Of course! She was a bitch, and we're glad to be rid of her!" replied Kai. Kai then turned to Cream, "How can we repay you?" he asked Cream.

"Could you fly us back to Emerald City?" Cream asked.

"Nope. But we'll take you past the forest, though!" replied Riku. Kai smacked Riku on the head.

"Moron! We have to ask Captain Shadow before we go anywhere!" scolded Kai. Riku looked around, but couldn't find Shadow. "Hmm … he's probably at the strip club already. Well, I guess we'll just have to fly you guys there without him." suggested Kai.

"Oh, thank you so much!" Cream said happily. The gang was lead to the front gate and a small group of clones picked them up and began flying them off to the front gate of emerald city.

"Hey, Tin Man?" asked Fox. Tin Man looked at Fox.

"What do you want, squirt?" prodded Tin Man.

"Are you mad that Cream melted the love of your life?" asked Fox, cringing while waiting for an axe to go through his face, but nothing happened.

"Kind of, but Cream didn't mean it. And I got her bra! That's about as good as actually getting her!" said Tin Man enthusiastically. Fox then rolled his eyes at Tin Man's shallow view of females as Tin Man pulled out the witch's bra and began cuddling it.

"I'll finally get my brain!" said Scarecrow randomly.

"I'll get to go home!" sighed Cream dreamily.

"Chao chao chao (I'll kill Cream)!" chirped Cheese.

"I'll finally have courage," said Fox.

"I got her bra!" shouted Tin Man as he rubbed Rouge's lacy undergarments on his face. Everyone else but Scarecrow rolled their eyes, as he was trying to remember where they were going while the tips of emerald lances poked up from behind the horizon line.

…

**Oh Tin Man, you're so shallow ;) What happened to Shadow anyway? And will the Eggman help them? Well, it's almost done, so dont' worry. I will try to muster the motivation to drag myself downstairs to the computer and type the last chapter so you can all move on with your lives, so stay tuned!**


	11. We Did it, Biznotch!

**I am so sorry this took so long. It's a really long chapter, though, so that should make up for it, I hope :) I decided that I won't split it up into two chapters because y'all have waited so long for it. Here you go!**

**Enjoy!**

**Diclaimer: I own nothing but Riku and Kai, so there :P**

Chapter **11 !!!!!1!!!111!!!!1!!! **_We Did it, Biznotch!_

The quintet (That's my new favorite word, if you couldn't tell) waved goodbye as the small band of Shadow clones flew off towards the late wicked witch's castle to party. They entered Emerald City and went straight for the Eggman, noting the odd smell seeping from the bush next to the entrance to the Eggman's room. They were standing in the corridor in front of the floating head of the Eggman, bobbing his head in time to E.G.G.M.A.N. When the song was over, the head had finally noticed them and appeared a bit startled.

"Who dares walk in on The Eggman while he's busy!" the floating head bellowed as his mustache bristled in annoyance and neon flames flared behind him.

"We have the wicked witch's bra!" declared Scarecrow cheerfully. Everyone then looked at Tin Man, waiting for him to show the bra.

"Well?" growled the Eggman, growing more impatient then he already was. Fox elbowed Tin Man in the gut, and then held his elbow in pain as a clang rang through the chamber. Scarecrow then leaned over to Tin Man.

"Why aren't you bringing out the bra?" whispered Scarecrow to Tin Man.

"What bra?" Tin Man answered too quickly and too loudly. Scarecrow then tackled Tin Man to the ground and pulled the lacy undergarment out from hammerspace. Scarecrow stood up and chucked it towards the Eggman while standing on Tin Man to try and prevent him from getting up. Too bad hay isn't heavy enough to hold down a metal axe man for long. Tin Man shoved off Scarecrow effortlessly and ran towards the object of his affection, only to fall flat on his face and be crushed by a cow.

"What the-?" Tin Man questioned as he moved his head, realizing that Fox had tackled him, and the cow fell on Fox.

"I thought Fox was over that whole cow thing," said an astonished Cream. Scarecrow shrugged and looked up at the Eggman.

"There's the bra!" Scarecrow proclaimed, pointing at the fussed over article of clothing. The Eggman gaped at the bra strewn across the floor, the only remnant of the wicked witch that Tin Man was desperately reaching for from his position under the cow twenty feet away. The cow mooed in protest as she felt the tin echidna under her struggle.

"Don't struggle so much! It makes everything worse," scolded Fox, who was now halfway out from under the cow.

"How are you so far out?" Tin Man yelped.

"Experience," Fox answered simply. Fox finished crawling out from under the cow and went back to stand with the others while awaiting the Eggman's reply. The floating head had finally peeled it's eyes from the bra and looked up at the gang.

"Amazing. Simply amazing! You actually did it!" commended the Eggman, trying to clap but then remembering that he didn't have hands. "I should have given this thing hands …"

"Huh?" asked Cream.

"Uh, nothing!" replied the Eggman. His eyes narrowed slightly and began shifting left and right suspiciously. Tin Man had finally crawled out from under the cow and began racing to the bra laying before the green, gaseous head. "Get away from that!" bellowed the Eggman. Tin Man eeped and ran to the others to cower.

"Who's cowardly NOW?" said a smirking Fox.

"Oh, shut up, you smart ass!" snapped Tin Man.

"But I'm a fox!" retorted Fox.

"I thought you were a lion!" an astonished Scarecrow said to Fox.

"SILENCE!" roared the Eggman. The quintet huddled together and began quivering with fear.

"Aren't you going to help us now?" Cream asked after a few moments.

"I never said I was going to help you," said the Eggman stuffily.

"WHAT!" the fellowship shouted together. They all began shouting at the Eggman. Cream eyes were brimming with tears as she spoke and so were Cheese's, but that was because Cream was choking him to death again. Fox and Scarecrow were trying to persuade the Eggman into helping them, while Tin Man was flat out pissed and throwing every swear and insult that had been invented at the floating head.

"I said that you needed to get the bra so I _can_ help you, not necessarily that I _would_ help you!" boomed the Eggman in a loud voice so he could talk over the protesting party.

"Muggle f---ing troll s---!" screamed Tin Man. "Your mother is a f---ing s------ ----- --- ----- hippopotamus ----!" Tin Man began screaming but Scarecrow slammed a hand over his mouth, but Tin Man's muffled vocals rambled on.

"The Great Eggman has spoken!" bellowed the Eggman as his head disappeared and the fire died down to glimmering embers, resembling a neon molten lava pool. Cream fell to her knees and began bawling, and Scarecrow and Fox rushed to her aid.

"- in a castle far away where no one can hear you f--- --- ---- soup ---- -" Tin Man was still rambling away before Scarecrow clasped a hand over his mouth again.

"Don't cry, Cream!" Fox told Cream as he kneeled down to her and gave her a hug.

"The Eggman is just a prick!" interjected Scarecrow from his position next to Tin Man.

"I know," said Cream as her sobbing softened to sniffles, "it won't be so bad to live here with you guys. It's kind of like being hom-" she started, and then broke out into a new crying fit. Scarecrow decided to go comfort Cream and went to her side.

"---- ---- -------- alakazam!" Tin Man finished. He was gasping for breath and noticed Cream crying. "What happened?" asked Tin Man, " And where's that mother f---ing Eggman?" The others simply ignored him. A foot away from Cream, Cheese was gaining consciousness again and sat up. He looked over to the Eggman's throne area and noticed a curtain nearby shuffling slightly.

"Chao chao (What the hell)?" Cheese chirped as he fluttered over to the curtain and pulled it all the way back to reveal a green crocodile pulling levers and turning cranks. Cheese looked over to the bra and noticed that a claw was coming down to retrieve the bra lying on the floor in front of the throne. The crocodile looked over and noticed the curtain open, but couldn't close it before the rest of the group noticed him too.

"Who are you?" asked Scarecrow. Suddenly the Eggman reappeared again in a flash of light.

"Ignore the crocodile behind the green curtain. He is of no importance!" the floating head bellowed. Cheese simply opened the curtain in the middle of his sentence to reveal the crocodile speaking into a microphone. "Don't open that curtain again! Get away you, you … uh …" the crocodile shouted into the microphone as the rest of the group approached him. They stood there staring at one another for a while until the crocodile sighed.

"Okay, you got me," submitted the crocodile as he stepped out of the booth he was standing in.

"Wait … YOU'RE the Eggman?" asked Scarecrow, as stunned as the rest of the group.

"Yep," the crocodile sighed. Cream realized that he looked just like that weirdo that jumped in through her window one night back home. Cream began crying harder at the thought of home.

"So you're just some hack who's been jerking everyone's chain just to rule the country as an all powerful floating head?" Scarecrow asked.

"You must be Sir Points out the Obvious, A.K.A Scarecrow," the crocodile said to Scarecrow.

"How did you know?" asked an astonished Scarecrow. No one was surprised at this statement, so Scarecrow was ignored.

"I am Vector the Crocodile. Wizard extraordinaire!" proclaimed Vector, thrusting his hand in the air.

"I thought you were a salesman," thought Cream aloud. She didn't notice that she let her thoughts slip, but did notice how nervous Vector suddenly looked.

"Uh, well, I'm not …" said Vector slowly. He then decided to move on.

"So you wanted a brain, huh?" Vector asked of Scarecrow, who was absentmindedly picking his nose, or trying, anyway. It's kind of hard to pick a round nose with no apparent nostrils, and don't ask how I know.

"Yup!" Scarecrow responded cheerfully.

" Well, how can you walk, talk, think, and breathe without a brain?!" Vector shouted at the oblivious blue scarecrow.

"I don't breathe," Scarecrow countered, sounding hurt.

"How can you walk, talk, and think if you don't have a brain?" Vector ask, unhindered by his brief lapse in thought.

"You know, I never really figured that out. It was always pointed out, but never addressed …" Scarecrow mused to himself, hand on his chin. The author began whistling while twiddling her thumbs. "So, what DO I get?" asked the Scarecrow.

"Let me get my bag of lies- er - magic.!" said Vector as he scuttled into the booth and procured a red bag from behind a shelf, while Tin Man snuck over to the bra on the floor and tucked it away into hammerspace, hoping no one noticed. Vector dug through the red velvet bag and pulled out a rolled up a piece of paper tied with a wet noodle and handed it to Scarecrow.

"What's this?" asked Scarecrow, who sniffed the moldy paper and stuck his tongue out in disgust.

"A diploma to show your … specialness …" said Vector, who had a hard time describing Scarecrow's intelligence without insulting it.

"Thank you!" squealed Scarecrow as he pulled the noodle off of the paper and crammed the paper into his chest while gnawing on the noodle. Vector then turned to Tin Man and looked at him sternly. Tin Man groaned and handed over the bra. "You wanted a heart, right?" Vector asked Tin Man.

"Yeah, so hand it over!" demanded Tin Man, "The love of my life had to die in order for me to get it, you know!"

"But how could you love her without a heart?" Vector asked Tin Man.

"Well I- … don't really know," Tin Man answered as he wondered about what the crack-pot 'wizard' had just said. The anger had vanished from his face as he began to ponder this. Vector began rummaging threw his bag and pulled out an ad from a magazine.

"Here you go!" announced Vector as he handed the ad to the dumbstruck tin echidna.

"What the hell?!" Tin Man questioned.

"It's an ad for those love hotlines that people call. You could probably find someone there!" explained the green crocodile.

"Couldn't you have just given me the bra of my lost lover?" asked Tin Man.

"You have to move on. She's dead," was Vector's explanation to Tin Man, but he really was just a pervert and wanted the bra for himself. Vector turned to Fox and allowed Tin Man to ponder over the ad. "And you wanted courage, I believe," Vector asked Fox.

"Y- y- yes, sir," replied the terrified fox cub.

"Well, it might just be me, but if you decided to stop that crazy tin can from getting the bra back, risking the possibility of having another cow fall on you, I'd say you've got plenty of courage already!" explained Vector.

"Yeah, you're right!" exclaimed Fox, "Can I change my wish, then?"

"Why not?" shrugged Vector.

"Hey! If he can change his wish, I want to change mine too!" complained Tin Man.

"You already had your turn!" snarled Vector. Tin Man then crossed his arms and proceeded to pouting. "Go on," Vector prompted Fox.

"Can you make it so cows don't fall on me anymore?" asked Fox. Vector put his hand to his chin and began to think.

"It must have been a curse put on you by the wicked witch. It should have worn off by now, considering that long stretch of time where no cows fell on you," stated Vector.

"Then why did that cow fall on me earlier?" asked Fox, confused by this statement.

"There's a dairy farm right above here," Vector explained as he pointed to a hole in the ceiling right above the cow.

"Oh! Then what do I get?" asked Fox. Vector pulled out a horseshoe from the red velvet bag and handed it to a confused Fox.

"This is for luck, which you seem to desperately lack," explained Vector. The crocodile then finally turned to Cream. "What did you want from me, dear?" asked Vector in a gentle manner.

"I just want to go home!" bawled Cream as fresh tears came to her eyes. Cheese sighed and prepared for the storm.

"Don't cry, bunny. Now you calm down and I'll get right back to you, alright?" cooed Vector. Cream nodded and as she cried, Vector turned to go into the booth when he felt a tug on his leg. He looked down and noticed Cheese standing by his feet.

"Chao chao (What about me)?" asked Cheese, annoyed that he was left out. Vector smirked at the tiny neutral chao and grabbed a notepad and pen and wrote down something. He tore the note from the notepad and handed it to Cheese. Cheese scanned over the note and began to chuckle evilly to himself. "Chao chao chao (Why didn't I think of this)?" he wondered out loud.

"You were too bloodthirsty to give it thought," answered Vector for Cheese. Vector then turned and approached the sobbing rabbit again after she'd calmed down. "Where are you from, sweetie?" Vector asked Cream.

"Station Square," she answered. Vector paused for a moment.

"I've given it some thought, and I've decided that I'll take you there myself!" Vector declared.

"What?!" Cream blurted out, forgetting her manners for pretty much this entire chapter.

"I'm actually from the world where you come from, so I know the way there, and knew I'd have to leave here after everyone figures out I'm not an all powerful, giant floating head," explained Vector.

"Oh, thank you so much!" thanked Cream as she hugged Vector, and Vector found out he was even more perverted than he originally thought, because a very disgusting and perverted thought came to mind about Cream at that moment, and that scared him and the author slightly.

XXX

Shadow was searching the grounds of his mistress's castle, seeking the stragglers that hadn't left yet after his clones threw a giant party at the strip club celebrating Rouge's death. Shadow smirked as he thought about it. "Such morons," Shadow said to himself as he flew around a corner and spotted a small troupe of clones clustered against the castle. Many were strewn along the wall, passed out, and Shadow even spotted a pair making out as well. A hazy memory of a drunken snogging session came back to Shadow and made him shudder. He dived at the small band of drunken clones and proceeded to kick them off the premises. Shadow was tossing drunken bodies over the property line and finally got to the pair making out. Shadow saw signs that it was about to go farther when he grabbed one and flung him off the other. "Hm, well, I knew you argued like a couple, but I never thought this would happen," Shadow said smoothly to the one he pulled off.

"Mind your own business, Catpan!" The clone shouted in a drunken slur, "I love Riku!"

"You, or the alcohol, Kai?" Shadow asked him smoothly. Kai stuck his tongue out at Shadow and then threw up a little on the ground. His spines appeared to be stained with a milky fluid, which made Shadow think of an egg white on a banana. Shadow shook his head and thought that the alcohol fumes were going to his head.

"Hey, you can't talk to Chadow like that, Kai! He locht his liver!" slurred Riku.

"You mean luver?" asked Kai of his friend.

"Yeah, lever!" spouted Riku, who then passed out. Shadow shook his head and picked up Riku so he could chuck him over the property line. As Shadow walked away, Kai lunged at Shadow and tackled him around the legs, causing him to topple over backwards onto Kai. Shadow knew he was drunk, but couldn't take anymore crap, so he immediately stood up, picked up Kai and Riku, and punted them across the hills. Shadow smirked and continued his rounds. When he was sure he had checked every nook and cranny of the vast castle grounds twice, he traveled back to the last spot anyone had seen the wicked witch. The sentry tower. Shadow had finally reached the tower and stopped to take a breather. He was exhausted from chucking his drunk clones off of the property, and thought about coming back here after a short nap, but knew this couldn't wait. Shadow walked over to the center of the room, to the pile of clothes and kicked them away, revealing a lock and handle in the floor. Shadow pulled out a set of keys and unlocked the lock and pulled open the secret trap door. A black blur shot out of the trap door and began gasping for air.

"I thought you had abandoned me! What took you so long?" demanded Rouge the Bat while dusting off the spare set of clothing she kept under the floorboards.

"I had to dispose of my drunken clones. They are of no use to us now, for they have betrayed you," Shadow had explained, not moving from his position.

"I heard," Rouge muttered while going through the pile of clothes she had shucked off during her performance, "Where's my bra? They didn't take it, did they?" asked Rouge.

"No, the clones didn't touch your clothes," replied Shadow.

"Then where is it?" Rouge asked, growing impatient.

"The rabbit and her friends took it," Shadow began, taking in the priceless look on Rouge's face, "they apparently needed it so the Eggman could help them,"

"That perverted quack of a crocodile," muttered Rouge, "he just wanted my bra! What idiots for actually believing him!" She picked up the old robes on the ground and used them to smear away the make up on her face, revealing a pea-green muzzle underneath, and sighed, "At least I don't have to wear so much make up anymore," Rouge pondered.

"You look better without it," commented Shadow, walking over to Rouge, "Why do you put it all over your body, anyway?" he asked, always curious about it.

"For those odd incidences where I'm walked in on, like when one of your clones walked in on us," replied Rouge, blushing slightly at the memory. Shadow wrapped his arms around Rouge's form and pulled her close for a hug.

"Good thing that will never happen again, since everyone thinks you're dead. That was a stroke of genius and good acting back there," Shadow commented. Rouge turned to face him and looked into his ruby eyes, resembling bleeding mirrors, she always thought, and locked lips with her lover. They began to kiss quite passionately, as Rouge was shucking off her robe around her shoulders to allow it to drop to the floor, whilst Shadow removed his gloves so as to fondle Rouge better. The passion infused pair fell to the floor with a thump, Rouge on top, of course. While their embrace grew into a love making session, two witnesses observed them from the corner of the open window to the tower, not wanting to be seen.

"Aw," sighed one observer, "they wuv each other!" he slurred to his comrade.

"She has green skin …" said the comrade, dazed at seeing Rouge's naked form dragon snaking with their captain.

"I'm not surprised, really," mentioned the observer, "I saw it through a smudge in her make up once. I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me,"

"Be quiet, Riku! Do you want to get caught?" the comrade hissed at Riku.

"Oh, Kai. From what I hear, they wouldn't notice a heard of elephants stampeding right next to them!" rejoiced Riku. Kai nodded in agreement for once, as they watched the act they had only gossiped with the other clones about play out before their prying eyes. Kai wanted to look away, but found it extremely hard to even close his eyes while Riku watched with eagerness, absentmindedly sucking on the stump of the finger Cheese had stolen from him. Though Riku was against it, the peeping toms slipped away before the lovers were finished, remembering that they now had to find jobs. When the nasty deed was complete, Shadow and Rouge cuddled on the floor of the sentry tower lovingly.

"Hey, Rouge?" asked Shadow.

"Yes, my dear," prodded Rouge.

"How come last time we had sex your make up didn't come off, but this time it did?" Shadow continued.

"Simply because I wanted it to. It's enchanted to work that way," Rouge explained. Shadow nodded in understanding.

"We just had sex on a dirty, molding floor," Shadow said, masking his disgust.

"Then I'll go take a shower, and you go grab the saddle and riding crop," declared Rouge as she removed herself from Shadow's embrace and went to the showers, while Shadow chaos controlled to Rouge's tower, where he gathered the items and went straight to the bedroom to dress himself for the night's escapades. The bat and the winged hedgehog were never bothered again. Not by 'wizard', clone, or tax collector either, for a roaming pack of enchanted wolves tore up anyone who dare approach their love nest, and also took the rest of the fingers off Riku's mutilated hand.

XXX

A giant crowd had gathered at the town square of Emerald City to see off 'the Eggman' and the little bunny who had disposed of the wicked witch. They were swinging banners of deep green with "GET THE HELL OUT, ALREADY" sewed into them with blazing gold thread. Vector was standing inside a crimson hot air balloon, making a grand speech to the people of Emerald City, telling them to leave Espio in charge when they find him. Apparently, no one wants to look behind the plot device bush. Cream was saying goodbye to everyone and turned to her companions. "Mr. Fox, stay brave, and I hope that cows will never fall on you and shatter your bones into tiny shards again," Cream said to Fox, who was dabbing away tears with his tail.

"Uh, okay … -sniff- … I'm s- st- still going to miss you, Cream!" bawled Fox as he hugged Cream tightly and rubbed his snot into her dress. He finally let go, leaving a string of snot from his nose to her shoulder between them, which Cream didn't seem to notice. Cream then turned to Tin Man, who was drinking heartily from a can of beer so his tears wouldn't rust him over, which was contrary to what he told everyone else.

"I hope you find your true love soon and that you live happily ever after, Mr. Tin Man!" chirped Cream at Tin Man.

"Whuzzat? Oh, I hope I find my glove too. He's me alkeyhal buddy!" replied Tin Man as he stumbled a little towards Cream. Cream then turned to face Scarecrow, who was now trying to shred the paper that Vector had given him.

"It makes better stuffing when it's shredded," explained Scarecrow when Cream saw him tearing the greasy paper. Cream then walked over to Scarecrow and gave him a hug.

"I'm going to miss you the most, Mr. Scarecrow," Cream sighed to Scarecrow, who had hugged her back by now.

"Buttered Toast, Cream," said Scarecrow.

"Huh?" asked Cream, confused.

"You smell like buttered toast. And not that crappy burnt toast, either. It's juuuuust right," explained Scarecrow. Cream smiled at Scarecrow, not really knowing how you respond to such a statement.

"Will you get over here and quit makin' cutesy comments about everyone, already!" Vector shouted from the basket under the balloon. Cream left Scarecrow's embrace and picked up Cheese, who was reading his note given to him by Vector over and over again, memorizing every detail and letter. Cream stepped daintily into the basket and waved goodbye to all her friends and to the random townsfolk. Vector unhooked the latch that kept the basket tethered to the ground and pulled the lever above him to release a flame to help raise the balloon. Before the balloon could get a foot off the ground, a large gust of plot device wind blew through the city and shoved the basket and the hot air balloon, as well as Cheese's note, out towards the crowd.

"Chaooooo (Nooooo)!" screeched Cheese as he leapt from Cream's arms and after the note.

"Cheese!" Cream hollered after her pet chao. Cream then ran to the side of the basket and jumped over the edge to fetch her chao. Cheese had reached his note and clutched it close to his tiny chest, right before he was smashed up against Cream's. "Don't run off like that!" scolded Cream, but Cheese couldn't understand anything, due to the lack of oxygen to his brain. Cream then realized that she had just jumped out of the basket, her ticket home … She ran back to the hot air balloon. "Mr. Vector! Let the balloon down!" Cream hollered to the crocodile, who was now ten feet in the air.

"I can't! It's too far away and I don't know how the hell to run it!" shouted Vector to Cream.

"But I-" Cream began to protest, but Vector had already lost his attention and began waving at the crowd again.

"So long, weirdoes!" shouted Vector, as he waved. When he turned away, a thunderbolt came down from the sky and struck the balloon, creating a giant hole. The balloon, along with Vector, was then sent flying comically through the air, twisting and turning towards the sky until there was nothing left to see but light blue. The gathering had grown quiet and awed, but not by Vector's depart. A pink bubble was descending from the sky, and Cream remembered that it must be Amy, that pink hedgehog she met back by the Black Arms. As the bubble landed in the spot where the hot air balloon was once grounded and popped, Cream's conjecture proved correct. The pink hedgehog was in the same pink ballroom dress that Cream saw her in last time they met, but this time she had an oxygen tank strapped to her back and a oxygen mask on her face which was taken off immediately.

"This time I came prepared!" declared Amy as she gestured to the oxygen tank and mask on the ground.

"Amy!" cheered Cream as she ran over and gave the sorceress a hug. Geez, there's a lot of hugging in this chapter. "Mr. Vector disappeared and took the balloon with him and now I can't figure out how to get home!" Cream told Amy.

"Don't worry, sweetie! Have you learned your lesson?" asked Amy sweetly of Cream.

"… What lesson?" asked Cream, confused.

"You know … you ran away from home and learn that there's no place like home?" asked Amy, a little unsure this time.

"I didn't run away from home. A tornado came and took me away from home," Cream explained.

"Well crap in a hat! There goes my plan," pouted Amy as she began to think about how to get Cream home. "Well, what did you learn, then?" Cream put a hand to her chin.

"I learned that getting cows dropped on you is bad," thought Cream.

"Nah. You need to learn something more global, something that covers more bases of life and something all people can relate to," explained Amy.

"Why?" asked Cream.

"That's forth wall issues that I can't explain to you," Amy waved Cream off and let her eyes wander to the trio of oddballs that were Cream's companions. She looked over Fox and saw his shocked eyes and snot and tear smeared tail. She looked at Tin Man too, noticing his giant axe that he had slung over his shoulder and the six pack of beer in his left hand while he chugged a can. Then her eyes caught the last member of the group, and she fell in love. That tall, thin figure. The cerulean hue of the fabric that held him together. Those, lime, sharp eyes that were busy watching his gloved fingers twiddling with each other and watching the one that broke off fall to the ground so he could pick it up and sew it back in place up-side-down.

"Oops," said the delicate, lighthearted voice of that hedgehog like scarecrow as he flexed his finger and realizing that it bent the wrong way.

"Amy?" asked Cream, waving her hand in front of a dazed Amy's face. Amy snapped out of her daydreaming and looked at the bunny like it was the first time she'd ever seen her.

"Who is that handsome hedgehog over there?" asked Amy as she pointed at Scarecrow.

"Oh, that's Mr. Scarecrow. He's really nice," answered Cream. Amy walked over to the befuddled scarecrow as he tried to reattach his finger properly.

"Hey there Mr. Scarecrow," Amy said to Scarecrow, who looked up from his work, "I'm Amy the Good Witch. May I know you're name?"

"… I don't have a name. I'm just called Scarecrow. Everyone calls me Scarecrow. The old farmer who owned the field I stood in called me that, too. He'd come out of his house late at night with his shotgun when the neighborhood kids would come and throw eggs at me and he would say "You damn kids git the hell off mah field!" and then he'd shoot his shotgun at them and they'd run away. One time he actually got one of them in the head and he buried the kid right behind me and told me, "Them Gale Force will never find 'im behind Scarecrow, no siree," and then the next morning Cream came and freed me!" Scarecrow told Amy. Amy stood there in shock for a minute and then patted Scarecrow on the head, which made him giggle.

"That's nice …" Amy told him, a little unsure on how to react. Then an idea came to her. It hit her so hard it felt like an alien latching onto her face and smashing her into the ground with extreme prejudice. She went over to Cream. "That's it!" she told Cream.

"You found a way for me to get home?" asked Cream.

"Duh! You have learned to pay attention to you friends!" said Amy, "The reader knows you didn't really pay attention to much at the beginning of this story," she explained.

"The who knew what now?" asked a drunken Tin Man who stumbled over and into the conversation.

"Forth wall crap- can we please move on! I have to tie up the scarecrow and take him back to my mansion," Amy said as she put Cream in place, "Now Cream, I want you to click those boots together and say that you learned to pay attention to others," Amy told Cream.

"Chao chao chao "chao chao chao"?! Chao chao chao chao chao (What do you mean by "pay attention to others"?! She never pays attention to me)!" shouted an angry Cheese.

"Hush, you adorably dreadful thing!" said Amy to Cheese.

"Chao chao ('adorably dreadful')?" questioned Cheese.

"Say the words after you click your heels together 3 times!" directed Amy, ignoring Cheese completely.

"What about these boots?" asked Cream.

"A little late to ask, isn't it?" said Amy, who had become incredibly agitated over the past few seconds, "Now click those clonking boots together and go home already," Amy told Cream as she was pulling rope out of a frilly pink purse and tying it around Scarecrow. Cream did as she was told and clicked the heels of the ruby boots together 3 times.

"I've learned to pay attention to others, I've learned to pay attention to others …" she kept repeating over and over again and she closed her eyes and felt very dizzy all of a sudden. When she opened her eyes, she found herself lying in her own bed, her black and white bed. She looked around and noticed that everything else was deprived of color as well. "I must be back now," Cream said to herself. Cream then heard footsteps coming closer to her room.

"Cream? Are you awake, dear?" asked the sweet voice of Vanilla.

"Mom?" Cream wondered aloud. Vanilla opened the door to find that Cream was indeed finally awake.

"Oh, Cream!" Vanilla cheered as she ran over to hug her daughter. "Sonic! Knuckles! Tails! Cheese! Cream is awake!" Vanilla shouted.

"Chao chao chao chao chao (You don't have to be so freaken' loud about it)," mumbled an agitated Cheese who was sleeping next to the leg of the nightstand he was tethered to. More footsteps were heard ands then Sonic, Knuckles, and Tails were in Cream's room, all with casts on various body parts.

"Hey, Cream! Glad you're awake!" Greeted Sonic, who was in a neck brace and was waddling like a penguin to stay balanced because both arms were in casts.

"We thought you were a goner for a while," said Knuckles, who was in a wheelchair and had his upper body bandage free.

"Mmffl mmrf mf mmffl," said a muffled and full-body-casted Tails who was nudged into the room by Sonic.

"Hello!" Came a voice from the window. Everyone who could turned to the window to see a crocodile looking in the window, "Looks like she's woken up,"

"Wait a second," Cream interrupted. Everyone looked at her, a bit surprised by the interruption, "I've been asleep? When?" Cream asked.

"Well, since the tornado came through. You're lucky to be alive, my sweet," explained Vanilla to her daughter, "you hit your head pretty badly," Cream just stared at her mother, trying to remember if she hit her head or not.

"But I was in another world. A magical place where the Black Arms and an evil witch and wonderful friends lived! And you were there!" Cream said and pointed her finger at Sonic, "And you were there, too!" she said as she pointed at Knuckles, "And you where there," as she pointed at Tails, who had fallen asleep due to being awake for longer than his fragile body could stand, "and you …" she said as she pointed at the crocodile at the window.

"Oh, you crazy little girl! What could possibly make you think I was in some magical world in your dreams," said the crocodile shiftily.

"But …"

"Cream, dear, you still have a bit of a fever. Why don't you come down stairs and have something to eat, hmm?" interjected Vanilla. Cream looked helplessly at her mom, and then gave in.

"Sure!" Cream agreed with her mom, and got up from her bed and began shoving her way through the casted patients that clogged the doorway so she could get to the kitchen.

"Would you like to join us, Mister Vector?" Vanilla asked the crocodile at the window.

"Nah, I've got things to do anyway. Goodbye, Ms. Rabbit, have a happy afterlife!" Vector called as he wandered away from the window.

"What a strange croc …" thought Vanilla aloud. She then shrugged and escorted the injured field workers down to the kitchen to go eat some pie. As she closed the door behind her, a small forgotten chao sat on the floor, smiling to himself wickedly as he rubbed his little stubs for arms together and began laughing maniacally.

"Oh, Cheese! I almost forgot about you!" gasped Cream as she opened the door and entered the room, "Are you okay? You were in my dream, too. Don't think that I would forget about my most precious friend in the whole wide world!" Cream said as she ensnared Cheese in a suffocating bear hug. "Do you want to come down stairs and have some pie?" Cream asked Cheese, loosening her grip enough to let him speak. Cheese's eyes darted back and forth as he tried to think of how to get out of eating the pie. Cheese then started wiping at his eyes and yawned.

"Chaooo (Ahhh)" Cheese sighed as he tried to look incredibly sleepy.

"Oh, I guess you're probably tired from our adventure, huh?" asked Cream, and Cheese looked really confused. He thought that that was just a dream, but Cream apparently had the same dream.

"Chao (Creepy) …" muttered Cheese under his breath. Cream gently placed Cheese on the floor again and tightened the leash he was on so he wouldn't get away, and left the room. "Chao. Chao chao chao chao (Phew. That was a close one)," Cheese spoke to himself as he gazed around the room and heard the clattering of plates downstairs and remembered the plan that the eccentric crocodile gave him in the dream, which he was questioning. Was it all really just a dream?

"Yay! Poison berry pie!" Sonic cheered from the kitchen, and Cheese heard them all eating the pie hungrily, slurping noises could also be heard from the kitchen, along with a smack on someone's head, Knuckles' to be exact, while he protested. Suddenly, gagging was heard from downstairs, and several thuds followed, silencing the gagging. It was done. Cheese smirked to himself.

"Chao chao. Chao chao chao chao chao (I've done it. I've finally rid myself of those imbeciles)!" cried Cheese in ecstasy, "Chao chao chao chao chao chao chao (I finally have time to clean my stash of guns in the basement)," Cheese announced as he got up to walk to the basement, and then quickly being yanked back to the nightstand by his leash. Cheese started trying to undue the leash, but Cream had made it so tight, his stubby little arms couldn't slip it off. "Chao chao! Chao chao chao (Damn Evolution! Not giving me fingers) …" Cheese grumbled as he fiddled with the leash. He tried to pull the nightstand with him instead, but it was bolted to the ground. "Chao … chao chao … chao (No … there was … time now) …" Cheese muttered as he had a complete mental breakdown and curled into a tight little ball of blue, malicious cuteness.

"And there the naughty little chao stayed for a good long time,"

"And did he ever come out?"

"Not yet."

TEH ENDE

**Whad'ya think? I'm glad that I was able to actually go all the way through this story, having no clue how it was going to end. Kudos to Lordwindwalker for giving me the idea about Cheese actually succeeding his goal of killing Cream. I know that it became more serious towards the end, but I just couldn't think of a way to make it funnier. I thought the bittersweet ending (I borrowed the last 3 lines from Wicked (the book)) would make it okay, though. I had the intention of keeping Rouge alive from the start, though. That was all me, and a little bit from Wicked (the play). I will hopefully start those Bowser one-shots I've been meaning to do now (and various other things) , so keep your eyes peeled!**

**I do not plan on continuing this story (despite what the ending tells you), I might make a prequel pertaining to Rouge (Ala Wicked), but that's a big maybe. If you have any ideas, leave them in a review :)**


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